If i was given one wish...and this wish had to be realistic to some extent...i would wish that I would be able to ENJOY every single thing that i do. At every single moment.
Sunday, May 31, 2009
Thursday, May 28, 2009
Tuesday, May 26, 2009
Monday, May 25, 2009
Experiencee...
pray for a friend at skool...fr his presentation tmr tht he's extremely nervous for. He's atheist. But I told Him bout the good news of God...nd how He didn't need to be afraid. I shared with him how I dealt with my burdens. I told him that I would pray for Him. Tht if only He lifted all his burdens and worries up to God...everythin would be fine. I also did my best to encourage Him. Cuse all He really needed, was someone to turn to...someone who he could lift up all his stress to. And tht's when i thought it was a good idea, to tell him bout someone he could turn to. Someone I always turn to.
Nd sumthin amazing happened. He told me: "Conan, I don't know why...but i feel a lot better"
Nd in my heart...I was like "God, ur amazing."
So, through first-hand experience...encourage, care, and love. ESPECIALLY in a non-christian environment. You never know wut God has in store for them...the experience is truly beyond amazing.
Nd sumthin amazing happened. He told me: "Conan, I don't know why...but i feel a lot better"
Nd in my heart...I was like "God, ur amazing."
So, through first-hand experience...encourage, care, and love. ESPECIALLY in a non-christian environment. You never know wut God has in store for them...the experience is truly beyond amazing.
Rmb...
Rmb...When you say the words "I'm sorry", it doesn't necessarily mean you're wrong. Neither when you say the words "I forgive you" is he/she right.
Some things are a lot mre important...than being right. (i no u probably may've heard tht a lot...but i think tht's sumthin really important).
Some things are a lot mre important...than being right. (i no u probably may've heard tht a lot...but i think tht's sumthin really important).
Sunday, May 24, 2009
I would like to SHARE...
Yesterday, in Dido, I shared a bit...about my personal life. Probably some of the most "personal" things ever. In fact, I was the only one realli who had anything to share. Fr once, I hogged the shar-ing floor. But no one else had anything to say...so i jus went ahead. Other wise, i wud've stepped down a bit lol
I wanna thank Joie, fr such wrds of encouragement. I don’t mind putting it up…hope she doesn’t either.
"hey (:
thanks for sharing yesterday at dido!
just wanted to tell you that you're NOT stupid~God loves you SO SO SO much,even when you don't believe it. maybe you feel as if He created you by mistake, but He didn't (:
everyone isn't perfection, and it's about recognizing your flaws and trying to change them / accepting thembecause they make you who you are - truly unique! I often feel inadequate because It's hard for me to put how I'm feeling in words,so I feel like I can't express myself very well -therefore, it's difficult for me to open up in front of others (which is why I'm emailing you now cause it's just easier for me to talk hehe :p ) .
SO, Focus on the gifts that He has given you. I don't know you that well - but i know he's gifted you with the incredible talent for music! Not everyone has something as special as that like you.
Everyone doubts God once in a while, even strong Christians - how can you NOT doubt somethingthat's intangable.
I struggle very often myself with doubt, like I don't see him working in my life as he is with everyone elsebut sometimes I realize, maybe it's right in front of myand I'm just not looking hard enough.
but anyways, i was doing devos this morning,reading 1 Peter and I came across this verse. not sure it's too relevant, but:
6In this you greatly rejoice, though now for a little while you may have had to suffer grief in all kinds of trials. 7These have come so that your faith—of greater worth than gold, which perishes even though refined by fire—may be proved genuine and may result in praise, glory and honor when Jesus Christ is revealed.
So basically, although you endure trialsmaking you feel stupid & not pefect,you're put through these trialsto become closer to God. Next time you're in one of those situations,try to loook through a different perspective.Try to see how God is trying to work through youin the long run
~ I know you said you don't want to talk to God then,but if you're feeling THAT low, like you have nothign else to turn to -why not just give a chance to God.Minus well give it a shot, since everything else isn't workingahh, i don't even know what I'm talking about anymore.well i kinda do, but i don't know how to say ithopefully you understand vaguely what my unsuccessful attempt of advice is saying xD
Whenever you're feeling stupid,remind yourself that whatever you're enduringis just part of your journey to becomewho you are / contributing to your identity.To me, the key to successis that when you believe in yourself,you can do anything!! As cliche as that sounds,your true potential is unleashed because you are confidentin your own abilities.Your sucess will push you to be the best that you can be (:
Remeber to be patient, because everything works in His time.I guess I'll end this off with one of my favorite verses. Actually, Zara gave it to me when I first opened upabout my spiritual life at Winter Retreat this year.
Isaiah 40:28
28 Do you not know?
Have you not heard?
The LORD is the everlasting God,
the Creator of the ends of the earth.
He will not grow tired or weary,
and his understanding no one can fathom.
29 He gives strength to the weary
and increases the power of the weak.
30 Even youths grow tired and weary,
and young men stumble and fall;
31 but those who hope in the LORD
will renew their strength.
They will soar on wings like eagles;
they will run and not grow weary,
they will walk and not be faint.
It's not that relevant to your situationbut it's a nice verse to have with you (:sorry if my advice wasn't very goodi'm not that good at giving advice lollyou've probably heard these thingsover and over again - but there true!have a good week & i'll pray for you!
- joie"
you too are gifted Joie...nd it's the gift of comforting others=) Tht's an amazing gift God has given you. I notice u don't talk or open up too much during cell group sharings nd stuff...
But you definitely don't have a problem with expressing yourself...lol, actually i have tht same problem, nd i wus gonna share bout tht...if we didn't go ubber over-time lol. I too need to express myself through emails, cuse believe it or not, i suck at expressing myself verbally too; although it try lol.
I wanna thnx u so much for listening....nd those words of encouragement. They really did...give me another perspective to look at things, nd brightened up my day! It was great to be reminded...through those passages, nd through ur wrds.
Great ur doing devos!...i too struggle with tht. Nd i believe tht it really DOES help in your everyday life. Like, you feel a lot better, and in a more cheerful attitude, cuse u know ur doing everything for God.
Thnx for praying for me.
Your support & care alone (whether good advice or bad)...already gives me strength and encouragement to hang on to my faith. I no that God is working through ppl like you....to keep me accountable, and lift me up when i am down.
So i want to THANK YOU sooo much once again!! Thnx for sharing your devos with me. Like Bernard said, it really does lift the spirit of one who is down. Definitely great advice=)
you should share mre!
-Conan Yu=)
During the nite, I wud've had a LOT mre to share...but some topics i was hoping to touch upon were:
Talked bout:
- Times when u feel stupid & dumb, u wonder why God ever created you. Why He would even allow something like tht to happen. If there really WAS a God, y would He do this. Tht wus one of the sources of my doubt. I believed if God did exist, He wouldn't create someone as stupid & dumb like me.
-If God can create things that are so beautiful (not gonna go into any specifics), how much mre "beautiful" is the creator? He is the "beautiful One".
- Why'd God give us desires (ex. desire fr women), if it causes us to sin. He created us with hormones, tht stimulate tht desire, so it feels natural.
Didn't talk about:
- U no how ppl always say "Let God speak through u...", it doesn't happen. Even when I ask for it. Sometimes, I wonder wut it is...am i not praying earnestly enough?
-I get the most angry, nd doubtful bout God's existence when i get frustrated over sumthin...nd feel handicapped or uncapable.
- Don't know how to discuss with non-christians, the "relevance" of christianity. I often don't know how to answer questions like: "Why does God let ____ happen...if there even is one." Always "WHY" questions. Find those the most challenging. Also, it's hard to tell those ppl about Christ when they think it's BS.
- self-consciousness
-Haven't done devos lately. Busy-ness. How to overcome that?
-half the time I don't believe, is because it FEELS as if He does not answer prayers. (But GAP [God answers prayers], many times) Ex. I ask God for confidence...i didn't get it.
- I would be happy if i could jus act normal...why can't God help me do tht?
- the ability to share. (also, i studder crazily). I am sorta handicapped in tht aspect.
- Why am i conscious of myself, and how other ppl like at myself. When all tht really matters...is how God looks at me. Everyone else is really nothin but creations, from the creator. Which matters more.
I'll stop there. LOL
the reason im sharing this....is tht I'm SURE ppl go through some of this (which was evident from yesterday), nd I learned how valuable it is to share my experience with others, so that they TOO may learn from it.
I sent an email bout it too.
I wanna thank Joie, fr such wrds of encouragement. I don’t mind putting it up…hope she doesn’t either.
"hey (:
thanks for sharing yesterday at dido!
just wanted to tell you that you're NOT stupid~God loves you SO SO SO much,even when you don't believe it. maybe you feel as if He created you by mistake, but He didn't (:
everyone isn't perfection, and it's about recognizing your flaws and trying to change them / accepting thembecause they make you who you are - truly unique! I often feel inadequate because It's hard for me to put how I'm feeling in words,so I feel like I can't express myself very well -therefore, it's difficult for me to open up in front of others (which is why I'm emailing you now cause it's just easier for me to talk hehe :p ) .
SO, Focus on the gifts that He has given you. I don't know you that well - but i know he's gifted you with the incredible talent for music! Not everyone has something as special as that like you.
Everyone doubts God once in a while, even strong Christians - how can you NOT doubt somethingthat's intangable.
I struggle very often myself with doubt, like I don't see him working in my life as he is with everyone elsebut sometimes I realize, maybe it's right in front of myand I'm just not looking hard enough.
but anyways, i was doing devos this morning,reading 1 Peter and I came across this verse. not sure it's too relevant, but:
6In this you greatly rejoice, though now for a little while you may have had to suffer grief in all kinds of trials. 7These have come so that your faith—of greater worth than gold, which perishes even though refined by fire—may be proved genuine and may result in praise, glory and honor when Jesus Christ is revealed.
So basically, although you endure trialsmaking you feel stupid & not pefect,you're put through these trialsto become closer to God. Next time you're in one of those situations,try to loook through a different perspective.Try to see how God is trying to work through youin the long run
~ I know you said you don't want to talk to God then,but if you're feeling THAT low, like you have nothign else to turn to -why not just give a chance to God.Minus well give it a shot, since everything else isn't workingahh, i don't even know what I'm talking about anymore.well i kinda do, but i don't know how to say ithopefully you understand vaguely what my unsuccessful attempt of advice is saying xD
Whenever you're feeling stupid,remind yourself that whatever you're enduringis just part of your journey to becomewho you are / contributing to your identity.To me, the key to successis that when you believe in yourself,you can do anything!! As cliche as that sounds,your true potential is unleashed because you are confidentin your own abilities.Your sucess will push you to be the best that you can be (:
Remeber to be patient, because everything works in His time.I guess I'll end this off with one of my favorite verses. Actually, Zara gave it to me when I first opened upabout my spiritual life at Winter Retreat this year.
Isaiah 40:28
28 Do you not know?
Have you not heard?
The LORD is the everlasting God,
the Creator of the ends of the earth.
He will not grow tired or weary,
and his understanding no one can fathom.
29 He gives strength to the weary
and increases the power of the weak.
30 Even youths grow tired and weary,
and young men stumble and fall;
31 but those who hope in the LORD
will renew their strength.
They will soar on wings like eagles;
they will run and not grow weary,
they will walk and not be faint.
It's not that relevant to your situationbut it's a nice verse to have with you (:sorry if my advice wasn't very goodi'm not that good at giving advice lollyou've probably heard these thingsover and over again - but there true!have a good week & i'll pray for you!
- joie"
you too are gifted Joie...nd it's the gift of comforting others=) Tht's an amazing gift God has given you. I notice u don't talk or open up too much during cell group sharings nd stuff...
But you definitely don't have a problem with expressing yourself...lol, actually i have tht same problem, nd i wus gonna share bout tht...if we didn't go ubber over-time lol. I too need to express myself through emails, cuse believe it or not, i suck at expressing myself verbally too; although it try lol.
I wanna thnx u so much for listening....nd those words of encouragement. They really did...give me another perspective to look at things, nd brightened up my day! It was great to be reminded...through those passages, nd through ur wrds.
Great ur doing devos!...i too struggle with tht. Nd i believe tht it really DOES help in your everyday life. Like, you feel a lot better, and in a more cheerful attitude, cuse u know ur doing everything for God.
Thnx for praying for me.
Your support & care alone (whether good advice or bad)...already gives me strength and encouragement to hang on to my faith. I no that God is working through ppl like you....to keep me accountable, and lift me up when i am down.
So i want to THANK YOU sooo much once again!! Thnx for sharing your devos with me. Like Bernard said, it really does lift the spirit of one who is down. Definitely great advice=)
you should share mre!
-Conan Yu=)
During the nite, I wud've had a LOT mre to share...but some topics i was hoping to touch upon were:
Talked bout:
- Times when u feel stupid & dumb, u wonder why God ever created you. Why He would even allow something like tht to happen. If there really WAS a God, y would He do this. Tht wus one of the sources of my doubt. I believed if God did exist, He wouldn't create someone as stupid & dumb like me.
-If God can create things that are so beautiful (not gonna go into any specifics), how much mre "beautiful" is the creator? He is the "beautiful One".
- Why'd God give us desires (ex. desire fr women), if it causes us to sin. He created us with hormones, tht stimulate tht desire, so it feels natural.
Didn't talk about:
- U no how ppl always say "Let God speak through u...", it doesn't happen. Even when I ask for it. Sometimes, I wonder wut it is...am i not praying earnestly enough?
-I get the most angry, nd doubtful bout God's existence when i get frustrated over sumthin...nd feel handicapped or uncapable.
- Don't know how to discuss with non-christians, the "relevance" of christianity. I often don't know how to answer questions like: "Why does God let ____ happen...if there even is one." Always "WHY" questions. Find those the most challenging. Also, it's hard to tell those ppl about Christ when they think it's BS.
- self-consciousness
-Haven't done devos lately. Busy-ness. How to overcome that?
-half the time I don't believe, is because it FEELS as if He does not answer prayers. (But GAP [God answers prayers], many times) Ex. I ask God for confidence...i didn't get it.
- I would be happy if i could jus act normal...why can't God help me do tht?
- the ability to share. (also, i studder crazily). I am sorta handicapped in tht aspect.
- Why am i conscious of myself, and how other ppl like at myself. When all tht really matters...is how God looks at me. Everyone else is really nothin but creations, from the creator. Which matters more.
I'll stop there. LOL
the reason im sharing this....is tht I'm SURE ppl go through some of this (which was evident from yesterday), nd I learned how valuable it is to share my experience with others, so that they TOO may learn from it.
I sent an email bout it too.
Today...
Today, I went to a Sunday school where the topic was about “Intellectual Design”. And wut I got out of it is…we can’t “be”, for no reason. As mentioned b4, many times, there IS a purpose, a meaning in life. How does it feel…to know that ur jus made up of “packages of neurons”? a bunch of chemicals…mixed with dirt. I would be depressed. Nd so wus the speaker…b4 he came to accept and know Christ. That was actually the reason why, He turned to Christianity. Because it was just SO depressing to know that you have no purpose in life, that ur created for no reason. That your just a pack of neurons. But this…was what lead him to find God. God’s love and compassion.
P.S. Went to Candice’s yesterday…we sounded better than I thot we wud. Not implying we never sounded good.
P.S. Went to Candice’s yesterday…we sounded better than I thot we wud. Not implying we never sounded good.
The mind, the soul, the body...the mental, the spiritual, the physical
how to get rid of the consciousness of being conscious.
or is it....
how to get rid of the conscious of your consciousness?
either way...i mean the same thing. Don't exactly know how it presents itself to most other ppl but yea. Sumthin, i 've definitely been struggling with...almost my whole entire life.
normal. abnormal.
natural. unnatural.
conscious. unconscious.
prayer request: live my life...for the Glory of God. Then too...will tht "natural"-ness come.
or is it....
how to get rid of the conscious of your consciousness?
either way...i mean the same thing. Don't exactly know how it presents itself to most other ppl but yea. Sumthin, i 've definitely been struggling with...almost my whole entire life.
normal. abnormal.
natural. unnatural.
conscious. unconscious.
prayer request: live my life...for the Glory of God. Then too...will tht "natural"-ness come.
Thursday, May 21, 2009
Today, I tried to invite a girl in my class to come to Dido. I actually didn't know her that well...all i knew, is she came a couple of times before; nd from wut i perceived, she like it. Her bringing it up already kind of shows tht she was interested. (Well, she brought it up, cuse she noticed my VBS shirt from....like 5 YRS ago lol). It felt a lil awkward at first, but i reminded myself y i was doin wut i did. From wut i received...i got some positive feedback, bout church. Hopefully, she'll find it to come.
She's kinda shy, cuse she doesn't know anyone. Nd tht's one of the things that prevent ppl from coming...u dunno aneone. Tht's y I didn't come at first. Cuse i "thought" i didn't know anyone. It's hard to adjust to ur comfort zone, when u haven't been in it fr a while.
Second thing is, ppl think they're too "busy" to come. Which always seems to be the case. It IS quite true fr a lotta of ppl. But how busy....is busy.
She's kinda shy, cuse she doesn't know anyone. Nd tht's one of the things that prevent ppl from coming...u dunno aneone. Tht's y I didn't come at first. Cuse i "thought" i didn't know anyone. It's hard to adjust to ur comfort zone, when u haven't been in it fr a while.
Second thing is, ppl think they're too "busy" to come. Which always seems to be the case. It IS quite true fr a lotta of ppl. But how busy....is busy.
I can’t even take care of myself, how do I take care of others?
where am i going in life...how am i gonna live my life in the future...how am i gonna look out for ppl in the future, nd vice versa.
it's one thing to "wanna" help ppl...it's another thing, if u can. Emotion/desire & capability don't balance out.
What happens, happens. What's done, gets done. What you are capapble of doing...is wut you should expect. Nothing more. Life sucks...when u keep wanting more and expecting more from yourself. Just do wut u do. If u can't do it, be happy tht you tried. You DID wut u could do. Nd tht's all tht should matter to u. I try not to let outside influences/distractions shake or move me fr wut i stand firm in.
where am i going in life...how am i gonna live my life in the future...how am i gonna look out for ppl in the future, nd vice versa.
it's one thing to "wanna" help ppl...it's another thing, if u can. Emotion/desire & capability don't balance out.
What happens, happens. What's done, gets done. What you are capapble of doing...is wut you should expect. Nothing more. Life sucks...when u keep wanting more and expecting more from yourself. Just do wut u do. If u can't do it, be happy tht you tried. You DID wut u could do. Nd tht's all tht should matter to u. I try not to let outside influences/distractions shake or move me fr wut i stand firm in.
Wednesday, May 20, 2009
I tried somethin new today...I ate dinner at 5:00pm. As opposed to eating at 10:00pm - 11:00pm regularly at "usual dinner time".
Supposedly, it should help me sleep better so that i actually GET the rest i need. Instead of "going to bed"...nd sleeping a couple hours later. The theory behind it is...don't EAT nd Sleep (rite away). Cuse digestion also requires energy...nd it takes away from ur sleep. So Eat...................then sleep. I always knew tht was unhealthly...but i didn't know it was THAT unhealthy. Destroyed my whole system lol; ruined my schedule. Why didn't someone tell me b4! jks, it's my fault.
Hope this "stipulation" is true...it better be...I guess I'll find out soon enough.
Supposedly, it should help me sleep better so that i actually GET the rest i need. Instead of "going to bed"...nd sleeping a couple hours later. The theory behind it is...don't EAT nd Sleep (rite away). Cuse digestion also requires energy...nd it takes away from ur sleep. So Eat...................then sleep. I always knew tht was unhealthly...but i didn't know it was THAT unhealthy. Destroyed my whole system lol; ruined my schedule. Why didn't someone tell me b4! jks, it's my fault.
Hope this "stipulation" is true...it better be...I guess I'll find out soon enough.
Plz...Thnx.
hey, small prayer request guys...can any one reading this pray for my wisdom and time management skills through everything i do, in general.
Not to mention memory loss (at early age)...i always forget wut i want to say, or do. You guys can pray for tht too. Thnx=)
Not to mention memory loss (at early age)...i always forget wut i want to say, or do. You guys can pray for tht too. Thnx=)
Tuesday, May 19, 2009
hmmm...I'm glad I switched to blogger.
On my xanga, i look back nd woowww...nothin but complaints, dis-satisfaction, ungratefulness, anger, trash-talking, rash-talking, cash-talking, back-talking...etc, etc...definitely not healthy. Spiritually, mentally, physically.
Now when i wanna rant, or talk bad bout someone, or "gossip"...I'll have no where else to do it. Except in front of God. I'd jus be able to lift everything up to Him. Nd instead of telling the whole world bout my misery...I can tell the whole world bout all the blessings tht have fallen upon me. I can tell the whole world, that there is love...from no other greater One.
In a way, I feel a bit more encouraged heree...because i often get feedback + encouragement + wrds of advice from ppl on how to improve my spirituality and my walk with God. Tht's wut i have to sayyy...PEaceee.
On my xanga, i look back nd woowww...nothin but complaints, dis-satisfaction, ungratefulness, anger, trash-talking, rash-talking, cash-talking, back-talking...etc, etc...definitely not healthy. Spiritually, mentally, physically.
Now when i wanna rant, or talk bad bout someone, or "gossip"...I'll have no where else to do it. Except in front of God. I'd jus be able to lift everything up to Him. Nd instead of telling the whole world bout my misery...I can tell the whole world bout all the blessings tht have fallen upon me. I can tell the whole world, that there is love...from no other greater One.
In a way, I feel a bit more encouraged heree...because i often get feedback + encouragement + wrds of advice from ppl on how to improve my spirituality and my walk with God. Tht's wut i have to sayyy...PEaceee.
u no...ppl are out there waiting...when are YOU gonna "stop waiting" and get out there. There are more opportunities than you think. Many ppl want it...it's jus that someone needs to let them know they can have it (and that they NEED IT). School, work, social places, the outside...the world. There's much more to discover. Much more to experience.
Came back from birthday dinner. Jus me & my dad. Since my mom's not here at the moment, we were able to have some good father & son bonding time. I would say those are quite rare.
Thnx to all those who've encouraged me today...
P.S. My mom 's at disneyland rite now LOL. Enjoying some FREE admission rides nd events inside. Hope she has a safe trip back...which isn't, in a week.
Thnx to all those who've encouraged me today...
P.S. My mom 's at disneyland rite now LOL. Enjoying some FREE admission rides nd events inside. Hope she has a safe trip back...which isn't, in a week.
Birth-DAy (*Thoughts)
BEST Birthday Ever...
not realli cuse of the stuff i got out of it (well, i received a quite a lot, the day b4)...but cuse i realized how blessed i was. It was a HAPPY birth-day for me today. I was rather in a grateful mood. I couldn't really ask for anything more, than what God gave me today. Which was a cheerful & peaceful heart full of Joy. It came jus so naturally...best present ever, God.
As an 18 yr old, as an adult, i think God has changed me up till now. Not instantly, but progressively...I've learned to look at things and live a life of thanksgiving. Everything is really worth giving thanks to God. But it's really important that u see it. I've beginning to see more and more of the blessings that God has ever given me.
not realli cuse of the stuff i got out of it (well, i received a quite a lot, the day b4)...but cuse i realized how blessed i was. It was a HAPPY birth-day for me today. I was rather in a grateful mood. I couldn't really ask for anything more, than what God gave me today. Which was a cheerful & peaceful heart full of Joy. It came jus so naturally...best present ever, God.
As an 18 yr old, as an adult, i think God has changed me up till now. Not instantly, but progressively...I've learned to look at things and live a life of thanksgiving. Everything is really worth giving thanks to God. But it's really important that u see it. I've beginning to see more and more of the blessings that God has ever given me.
Monday, May 18, 2009
Back...nd spoiled
guess im backk...
all i can say is...I'm soo lucky (And spoiled), to be the youngest one in WHOLE entire family (including all relatives on both sides)...I'll always be a kid to every one. Although I'm 18...I'll always be the "cute" lil child I always was to them. I mean, all attention was directed at me once again. Everyone treated me like an 8 yr old again...Gave me a Wii, TONS of lai see from every single auntie/uncle/cousin, and showed EXTRA love and care to a baby cousin tht i always was.
This whole weekend, I spent the nites at the bride's house. I've never felt so young in such a group...it wus like i was a child to everyone. My cousins had their OWN children; almost the same age as me (k no, im jking, but still...grandchildren alreadi)
Anewayz, during the wedding, i saw some SCAC ppl there too lol (Justin, Karen, Ernest, Alex, Derek, other ppl around the same age...). There was a dance after; where Karen had to drag me on the dance floor when she saw tht i wus jus sitting there. I've got some pics (how they're like when they're NOT in Dido lol). I also danced with the bride (a.k.a. my cousin); went pretty well lol. I learned how to dance! well, properly...(literally, first time in actual dance...never been in one). Also, Got some first-hand experience with drinking...it's actually not too bad. I'm a legal drinker now...i think. ITT was WILDD...mebbe cuse i don't go to much parties. But ppl got drunk nd crazzyy. I wus gonna try it out...but my parents were rite beside.
Anewayz, the wedding was event-ful...definitely a HAPPY day, fr my cousin Elsie and her husband. I'M happy for them. I'll admit...I cried during the Wedding...cuse i was too happy...tears of joy. Not very often, fr someone like me. The food is amazinggg in Calgary...can tell they spent a lot on tht.
(I'll update with pics later on)
Can't believe i gotta be in skool tmr...like i jus left yesterday. Literally, i didn't do anythin over the whole trip.
unchanging love:
usually, over time, when ppl don't see each other for a while...they don't really feel like they know the person anymore; cuse ppl change. They don't know if he/she is the same person anymore; which often affects the way you treat or act around one person. We're often unsure...if the relationship's still there. But never, have you treated me any more differently that you've treated me 5 years ago. (Tht's really hard to do, fr some ppl.) I'm always the lil cousin you always treasured and loved. And you've still shown me tht love till today. Somehow, I always thought i was a favorite to you...how you always somewhat cared and treated me ever so special, relative to many others. and you still do LOL. But you've shown me...tht truly, there IS a relationship. nd this relationship...is unchanging; tht lasts forever.
all i can say is...I'm soo lucky (And spoiled), to be the youngest one in WHOLE entire family (including all relatives on both sides)...I'll always be a kid to every one. Although I'm 18...I'll always be the "cute" lil child I always was to them. I mean, all attention was directed at me once again. Everyone treated me like an 8 yr old again...Gave me a Wii, TONS of lai see from every single auntie/uncle/cousin, and showed EXTRA love and care to a baby cousin tht i always was.
This whole weekend, I spent the nites at the bride's house. I've never felt so young in such a group...it wus like i was a child to everyone. My cousins had their OWN children; almost the same age as me (k no, im jking, but still...grandchildren alreadi)
Anewayz, during the wedding, i saw some SCAC ppl there too lol (Justin, Karen, Ernest, Alex, Derek, other ppl around the same age...). There was a dance after; where Karen had to drag me on the dance floor when she saw tht i wus jus sitting there. I've got some pics (how they're like when they're NOT in Dido lol). I also danced with the bride (a.k.a. my cousin); went pretty well lol. I learned how to dance! well, properly...(literally, first time in actual dance...never been in one). Also, Got some first-hand experience with drinking...it's actually not too bad. I'm a legal drinker now...i think. ITT was WILDD...mebbe cuse i don't go to much parties. But ppl got drunk nd crazzyy. I wus gonna try it out...but my parents were rite beside.
Anewayz, the wedding was event-ful...definitely a HAPPY day, fr my cousin Elsie and her husband. I'M happy for them. I'll admit...I cried during the Wedding...cuse i was too happy...tears of joy. Not very often, fr someone like me. The food is amazinggg in Calgary...can tell they spent a lot on tht.
(I'll update with pics later on)
Can't believe i gotta be in skool tmr...like i jus left yesterday. Literally, i didn't do anythin over the whole trip.
unchanging love:
usually, over time, when ppl don't see each other for a while...they don't really feel like they know the person anymore; cuse ppl change. They don't know if he/she is the same person anymore; which often affects the way you treat or act around one person. We're often unsure...if the relationship's still there. But never, have you treated me any more differently that you've treated me 5 years ago. (Tht's really hard to do, fr some ppl.) I'm always the lil cousin you always treasured and loved. And you've still shown me tht love till today. Somehow, I always thought i was a favorite to you...how you always somewhat cared and treated me ever so special, relative to many others. and you still do LOL. But you've shown me...tht truly, there IS a relationship. nd this relationship...is unchanging; tht lasts forever.
Sunday, May 17, 2009
it's now 5:00a.m. at Calgary...i couldn't sleep. Bloody nose woke me up...nd i haven't had a bloody nose in yrs. (i jus rmb i ate everything tht my stomach could hold, during the wedding banquet...cuse it was like a buffet. nd I drank a bit. tht might've been the reason...)
I had a nightmare...I dreamt tht i was already bac in Toronto. Scared the heckk out of me. I'm like how the heckk did I get bac to Toronto so fast. I didn't even do anything yett!!...
I had a nightmare...I dreamt tht i was already bac in Toronto. Scared the heckk out of me. I'm like how the heckk did I get bac to Toronto so fast. I didn't even do anything yett!!...
Friday, May 15, 2009
At Calgary...
...supposedly, i'm responsible for helping cook breakfast fr all the "lang lui"s tmr, i mean...flower girls? don't know wut other jobs nd responsibilities i'll get. it's not very often these kinda occassions happen. I don't even rmb the last time...I went to a wedding.
When i stepped off the plane today...I realized, I lost that "wonder" of flying on a plane! (if u no wut i mean). As in, i lost all tht excitement, that i use to have. My face use to light up everytime, b4 i entered the plane; anticipating every second b4 i got on. Now, even though the planes nowadays have a lot more features nd stuff, nothing gave me tht same excitement i used to have b4. I wasn't a happy little kid anemore. It wus jus like any normal transport vehicle that i would go in. In fact, at some point, i was wondering how much longer the plane trip wud be.
Btw, the last i flew was prob. 5yrs ago.
side:
When i stepped off the plane today...I realized, I lost that "wonder" of flying on a plane! (if u no wut i mean). As in, i lost all tht excitement, that i use to have. My face use to light up everytime, b4 i entered the plane; anticipating every second b4 i got on. Now, even though the planes nowadays have a lot more features nd stuff, nothing gave me tht same excitement i used to have b4. I wasn't a happy little kid anemore. It wus jus like any normal transport vehicle that i would go in. In fact, at some point, i was wondering how much longer the plane trip wud be.
Btw, the last i flew was prob. 5yrs ago.
Calgary...WUDD UPP
Mann...this week's been pretty crappy. Hopefully this weekend'll take everythin away...I miss my cuz'. All my cousins are so nice. Whooaaa...i jus realized, all my cousins are married! 0_0, except for me. Sooo OLDD! makes me feel young. Don't think an event like tht in my life's happening anytime soon. Not even somethin im suppose to think about at this point in time! I'm happy fr all my cousins. All my big cousins out there, who looked after me ever since i wus a lil child, a lil rascal, a trouble-maker. You guys have offered nothing but only love to me! We've also grown soo much all these years, spiritually & physically. God Bless!
Congratulations to ELSIE & ROY...lookin forward to the wedding.
Congratulations to ELSIE & ROY...lookin forward to the wedding.
Wednesday, May 13, 2009
How NOT to "weird" ppl out...
What's a good way to spread the gospel without ppl thinking that ur weird (often through a "r u weird" look)? To treat everything you say, as a whole lot of "BS" (is wut they call it).
How?
P.S. turns out I'll only be in Calgary for the weekend...I guess I'm NOT missing skool.
How?
P.S. turns out I'll only be in Calgary for the weekend...I guess I'm NOT missing skool.
What's my identity?...(at school)
"I'm confused"...(i was told), nd i can't agree more lol. I'm feelin confused RITE now. I never know what im doing, which is quite true. Too many ppl have told me the same thing. I've told myself the same thing! i find it realli obvious...but i wasn't sure if other ppl would pick it up. I take it often as a joke, when ppl say tht...but i no there's some (actually, a lot, or 100%) truth behind it.
Here's the main point of this post:
Personally, I've thought about it. If ppl really have tht impression of me, how does it affect the way ppl see me, as a christian. Cause EVERYONE knows I'm christian. Is it bout time i Step-things-up?? But I'm already doing what i CAN do. Honestly I've always had the thought that I might be a bad witness fr God. I'm not doing good in academics. I'm clearly clueless half the time (nd the sad part is, ppl think im pretending, nd tryina catch attention or sumthin...which is even worse, cuse they think tht's even MORe stupid). Soo, wut can i do? get rid of the stupidness? I no this sounds kinda dry, but tht's how im like...tht's who i am. I clearly am working on it. I've always kept the thought...of how the way ppl look at me, can affect my identity as a christian. I don't want ppl to be goin like..."I don't wanna be as stupid as this kid, if tht's wut happens when u become a christian". Like my overall presentation, i always thought was vital to my identity. Even though it's not a really BAD one (as in dirty & sinful) but, ppl will look at you, and judge you, by what they know you best by. In my case, i personally think it's my christian identity. I gotta polish it up a bit. Tht's partially where the pressure comes from. Not tryina imply anything, but "most" christians...at skool are MAD smart, like they're already a good witness to everyone already. If they asked ppl to come to Christ, i think it would be a lot easier. Cuse it seems like there are clearly benefits in doing so. As opposed to me asking...not so much. Sometimes i ponder...if tht's why.
(srry, for the overload/over-analysis of the situation, It's not a big deal, i jus made it one. Well, in this blog.)
need motivation...lack interest...and HAFTA focus. I do things a lot better & efficient when i like doing it, and nothing can distract me from it. But it's also the extreme opposite if i don't.
3 tests/quiz on Fri.
Here's the main point of this post:
Personally, I've thought about it. If ppl really have tht impression of me, how does it affect the way ppl see me, as a christian. Cause EVERYONE knows I'm christian. Is it bout time i Step-things-up?? But I'm already doing what i CAN do. Honestly I've always had the thought that I might be a bad witness fr God. I'm not doing good in academics. I'm clearly clueless half the time (nd the sad part is, ppl think im pretending, nd tryina catch attention or sumthin...which is even worse, cuse they think tht's even MORe stupid). Soo, wut can i do? get rid of the stupidness? I no this sounds kinda dry, but tht's how im like...tht's who i am. I clearly am working on it. I've always kept the thought...of how the way ppl look at me, can affect my identity as a christian. I don't want ppl to be goin like..."I don't wanna be as stupid as this kid, if tht's wut happens when u become a christian". Like my overall presentation, i always thought was vital to my identity. Even though it's not a really BAD one (as in dirty & sinful) but, ppl will look at you, and judge you, by what they know you best by. In my case, i personally think it's my christian identity. I gotta polish it up a bit. Tht's partially where the pressure comes from. Not tryina imply anything, but "most" christians...at skool are MAD smart, like they're already a good witness to everyone already. If they asked ppl to come to Christ, i think it would be a lot easier. Cuse it seems like there are clearly benefits in doing so. As opposed to me asking...not so much. Sometimes i ponder...if tht's why.
(srry, for the overload/over-analysis of the situation, It's not a big deal, i jus made it one. Well, in this blog.)
need motivation...lack interest...and HAFTA focus. I do things a lot better & efficient when i like doing it, and nothing can distract me from it. But it's also the extreme opposite if i don't.
3 tests/quiz on Fri.
Tuesday, May 12, 2009
Insight...from my Dad
I have a praise item...My dad has been cooking dinner for me this whole week & has done soo much of the cleaning in the house...I’m thankful for that. That was supposed to be my job too during this week. Actually, wait a minute, his back isn't even fully healed yet from last time's accident, why is he doing all tht?!? I guess he saw that I was so busy & stressed out, nd had no time management skills wutsoever. So he decided to do me a favor. Can't let him do tht stuff anymore...I think i should do wut im responsible for any way. Wut else I found out…MY dad can cook! Realized tht after today. Thnx dad!
Anewayz, during dinner, we had a discussion lol (love those).
We talked about ghosts & spirits & souls. The topic came up cuse I brought it up. Reason being, was because my accounting class today, randomly had this discussion about ghosts and if they were real or not. lol it was kinda jks, cuse half way, we all started tellin ghost stories...which was somehow related to "Partnerships in a Business". Soo anewayz, during tht short lil discussion, I suddenly questioned myself: ARE there really ghosts/spirits? If so, whose spirits are they?
So, at the dinner table, I asked my dad: "Do you believe in ghosts/spirits?". Cuse the only spirit I only believed/knew of was the Holy Spirit, which came from God. But I was referring to more of the spirits from the dead, or spirits that still linger around and haunt you. Tht's wut the class was talking about. I really wanted to know about it. I wanted to know, if there were really such things as “haunted houses” and “haunted streets”. Anewayz, I forgot what he answered, but it lead to the next question:
Me: "What kinds of spirits are there?".
My dad answers: "If they're not God's spirit (Holy Spirit), then who else’ can it be? (implying the devil’s spirit)".
(My dad never answers a question with an answer. He always answers using another question…to make me think.)
Me: But what about spirits of the dead?
Dad: Those are actually the devil's/satan’s spirit, in the form of a human soul which can often be deceiving.
So to answer the question b4, it’s not the spirit of real dead ppl that haunt you, but demonic spirits that appear to be human spirits.
But u no sumthin new i found out today...when we die, we don't go straight to heaven...or hell. We become "asleep" (as the Bible puts it) until the second coming of Jesus. So technically, the statement ppl make when someone dies "he/she has gone to heaven..." is incorrect. We actually do not know happens to the soul when someone dies and where it lies, b4 Jesus comes back. But i kinda assumed that the souls are still on this earth, still inside the body, and is just waiting to be awakened (opinionated). That's why on the day of Jesus' glorious return to earth, it is known as the day of "judgement". All souls will rise from their dormant state, and God will look at His Book of Life, and determine those who are with HIm...and those are not. Also, around that time (after 7 years), He throws satan, his angels, and his followers into the lake of fire (known as hell). So againnn, technically, NoBody's in hell yet (at the moment). Satan's not even in hell yet. In fact, He is yet to be released, from the prison that God has caged him in...which during that time, is known as the rapture, or Apocalypse (which lasts for 7 years). Those who are still on earth, who are NOT yet believers are given a chance to believe (but they get it hard…cuse there will be torture nd suffering). Those who believe, would have already been taken to heaven by God. So tht’s wut I learned today. Well, half of it’s new to me. I dunno if u guys ever watched the movie “The Revelations”. It’s about the rapture, I got so scared fr a couple of days after watching. I checked my parents’ bedroom every now and then to make sure they were still there.
Sorry if this wus a bit hardcore, fr some ppl who don’t really know the context/background of this. Don’t really know wut ppl think of it. Esp ppl who aren’t christian. This blog was meant more fr ppl who wanna study or know mre about…the end of the world, and jesus’ second coming. Srry if ur reading my blog, nd have no idea wut im talking about.
Anewayz, during dinner, we had a discussion lol (love those).
We talked about ghosts & spirits & souls. The topic came up cuse I brought it up. Reason being, was because my accounting class today, randomly had this discussion about ghosts and if they were real or not. lol it was kinda jks, cuse half way, we all started tellin ghost stories...which was somehow related to "Partnerships in a Business". Soo anewayz, during tht short lil discussion, I suddenly questioned myself: ARE there really ghosts/spirits? If so, whose spirits are they?
So, at the dinner table, I asked my dad: "Do you believe in ghosts/spirits?". Cuse the only spirit I only believed/knew of was the Holy Spirit, which came from God. But I was referring to more of the spirits from the dead, or spirits that still linger around and haunt you. Tht's wut the class was talking about. I really wanted to know about it. I wanted to know, if there were really such things as “haunted houses” and “haunted streets”. Anewayz, I forgot what he answered, but it lead to the next question:
Me: "What kinds of spirits are there?".
My dad answers: "If they're not God's spirit (Holy Spirit), then who else’ can it be? (implying the devil’s spirit)".
(My dad never answers a question with an answer. He always answers using another question…to make me think.)
Me: But what about spirits of the dead?
Dad: Those are actually the devil's/satan’s spirit, in the form of a human soul which can often be deceiving.
So to answer the question b4, it’s not the spirit of real dead ppl that haunt you, but demonic spirits that appear to be human spirits.
But u no sumthin new i found out today...when we die, we don't go straight to heaven...or hell. We become "asleep" (as the Bible puts it) until the second coming of Jesus. So technically, the statement ppl make when someone dies "he/she has gone to heaven..." is incorrect. We actually do not know happens to the soul when someone dies and where it lies, b4 Jesus comes back. But i kinda assumed that the souls are still on this earth, still inside the body, and is just waiting to be awakened (opinionated). That's why on the day of Jesus' glorious return to earth, it is known as the day of "judgement". All souls will rise from their dormant state, and God will look at His Book of Life, and determine those who are with HIm...and those are not. Also, around that time (after 7 years), He throws satan, his angels, and his followers into the lake of fire (known as hell). So againnn, technically, NoBody's in hell yet (at the moment). Satan's not even in hell yet. In fact, He is yet to be released, from the prison that God has caged him in...which during that time, is known as the rapture, or Apocalypse (which lasts for 7 years). Those who are still on earth, who are NOT yet believers are given a chance to believe (but they get it hard…cuse there will be torture nd suffering). Those who believe, would have already been taken to heaven by God. So tht’s wut I learned today. Well, half of it’s new to me. I dunno if u guys ever watched the movie “The Revelations”. It’s about the rapture, I got so scared fr a couple of days after watching. I checked my parents’ bedroom every now and then to make sure they were still there.
Sorry if this wus a bit hardcore, fr some ppl who don’t really know the context/background of this. Don’t really know wut ppl think of it. Esp ppl who aren’t christian. This blog was meant more fr ppl who wanna study or know mre about…the end of the world, and jesus’ second coming. Srry if ur reading my blog, nd have no idea wut im talking about.
Back to the Heart...
I have a confession to make...
I often come to Dido for the warm encouragements and the comfort of other ppl. When the focus there...is really God. Everything should be centered around God ("God-centered" life). You go there to grow with ppl in Christ. And if you're growing without Christ...ur not really growing at all. If u go there jus to meet and talk to friends, u can go to any other social event. Tht is NOT the reason why you come to fellowship. I've been reminded about this before. And i realize it again...now.
Also, God wants us to GIVE, and not just receive. I constantly lose the meaning of fellowship. I forget the reason I'm there for.
"We often lose the purpose of many things...nd God often doesn't get the attention He deserves. We kinda jus push Him out...when we're so caught up with wut's at hand, and when we're too happy to need Him as a part of our life."
On another note, I wanna get out in the BEaUti-FUL weather God' given us this week, nd mebbe start warming up for some Softballll! But this week has been realli hectic fr me...skool's holding me back soo much. I have 3 tests in a row, starting tmr. Hopefully, I'll be a lot more free the next week. Actually, it's highly unlikely...whenever exams come near. *sigh..
P.S. 3 mre days till Calgary, I'll get to live in luxury again...jks. But the houses in Calgary are maddd huge (or mebbe it's jus their house). But i miss their big screen home theatres, and music rooms where u can jam, cuse they have everything...(dwelling in "material" again). But anewayz, I'll be missing Dido a lot, hope u guys have a great time in Dido this (wutever u guys may be doing)!
I often come to Dido for the warm encouragements and the comfort of other ppl. When the focus there...is really God. Everything should be centered around God ("God-centered" life). You go there to grow with ppl in Christ. And if you're growing without Christ...ur not really growing at all. If u go there jus to meet and talk to friends, u can go to any other social event. Tht is NOT the reason why you come to fellowship. I've been reminded about this before. And i realize it again...now.
Also, God wants us to GIVE, and not just receive. I constantly lose the meaning of fellowship. I forget the reason I'm there for.
"We often lose the purpose of many things...nd God often doesn't get the attention He deserves. We kinda jus push Him out...when we're so caught up with wut's at hand, and when we're too happy to need Him as a part of our life."
On another note, I wanna get out in the BEaUti-FUL weather God' given us this week, nd mebbe start warming up for some Softballll! But this week has been realli hectic fr me...skool's holding me back soo much. I have 3 tests in a row, starting tmr. Hopefully, I'll be a lot more free the next week. Actually, it's highly unlikely...whenever exams come near. *sigh..
P.S. 3 mre days till Calgary, I'll get to live in luxury again...jks. But the houses in Calgary are maddd huge (or mebbe it's jus their house). But i miss their big screen home theatres, and music rooms where u can jam, cuse they have everything...(dwelling in "material" again). But anewayz, I'll be missing Dido a lot, hope u guys have a great time in Dido this (wutever u guys may be doing)!
Monday, May 11, 2009
...i jus checked my softball email, nd wooohhh, we have one heckk of a team this year. Soooo manyy new ppl joined! Friggin surprised...many ppl i didn't expect to join, joined.
Most of them are gr. 9....so glad, tht ppl were so enthusiastic this year...to join softball. But on my part, I've haven't been going to many practices (although we've only had one), but i doubt I'll be going to many this yr.
Oh, nd i didn't know about this b4 cuse I missed the kick-off on Sun. (spent time with my father, on mother's day)
Most of them are gr. 9....so glad, tht ppl were so enthusiastic this year...to join softball. But on my part, I've haven't been going to many practices (although we've only had one), but i doubt I'll be going to many this yr.
Oh, nd i didn't know about this b4 cuse I missed the kick-off on Sun. (spent time with my father, on mother's day)
Back when I was innocent...
I used to be an agressive little child...
(Starting when I was 5 yrs old, i had already received a tattoo [a.k.a. scar] on my face, it's moon shaped if none of u guys noticed b4. I earned it when I tried to steal some guy's food; and when he saw me, he ran after me. When I saw him running at me, I panicked and I took off my shoe and threw it at him. Seeing that it stopped him a bit, i took off my other shoe, and back-handed/slapped/shoed him in the face. I thought it was an effective way to solve things. But wut i didn't know, wus that he was waiting for an open chance to dig is "nail-like" nails into my face, forming a crescent tht is now known as my tattoo. Back then, i didn't know how to think [and maybe i still don't]. I didn't know that each time i did what i did, i was making the guy more angier, pissed off, nd agressive. I learned my lesson after tht...cuse it's always been a reminder until now [bout 12 yrs]. My parents rmb it more than i do, cuse they see it on my face every day. They go "wut wus the guys name again...who gave u tht tattoo on ur face". I've forgiven, but i haven't forgotten. My parents (my dad in particular) hasn't seem to have forgiven...or forgotten lol) Still rmb his name...
I think we could make good friends though now...
Anewayz, i thought it was kinda fun...beating ppl up back then, but now...I GET beat up. Funny, cuse im even scrawnier than b4. I rmb i used to be able to take on my whole class...picked a fight with each and everyone of them. I forgot the reason why, but i had to fight a lot of them at one point. Now, I'm useless. All the martial arts training was useless (So WUt if u can do the splits LOL, ur jus sacking urself in the balls). Can't even defend myself now, i forgot how to stand up for myself. I've been a changed boy --->man, or is the other way around *sigh.
I'm afraid of everything I do now.
e.g. when i get robbed, I can't do anything about it (e.g. "u wanna give me $20...." me: "ummm...sure")
Other things i fear:
- I fear my parents
- I fear death (...i never knew we would die in this place...) [some ppl fear "living"...and want "death"]
- I fear not knowing what to say
- I fear presenting myself in front of people
- I fear not being able to “think” (freeze)
- I fear ppl smaller than me...cuse they're actually stronger...even if they appear weak
but u no who i don't fear enough of...God. Sometimes, it doesn't even occur to me, that I'm not doing somethin in God's likeness.
i was jus writing my testimony, nd lol i jus randomly thought back to this
(Starting when I was 5 yrs old, i had already received a tattoo [a.k.a. scar] on my face, it's moon shaped if none of u guys noticed b4. I earned it when I tried to steal some guy's food; and when he saw me, he ran after me. When I saw him running at me, I panicked and I took off my shoe and threw it at him. Seeing that it stopped him a bit, i took off my other shoe, and back-handed/slapped/shoed him in the face. I thought it was an effective way to solve things. But wut i didn't know, wus that he was waiting for an open chance to dig is "nail-like" nails into my face, forming a crescent tht is now known as my tattoo. Back then, i didn't know how to think [and maybe i still don't]. I didn't know that each time i did what i did, i was making the guy more angier, pissed off, nd agressive. I learned my lesson after tht...cuse it's always been a reminder until now [bout 12 yrs]. My parents rmb it more than i do, cuse they see it on my face every day. They go "wut wus the guys name again...who gave u tht tattoo on ur face". I've forgiven, but i haven't forgotten. My parents (my dad in particular) hasn't seem to have forgiven...or forgotten lol) Still rmb his name...
I think we could make good friends though now...
Anewayz, i thought it was kinda fun...beating ppl up back then, but now...I GET beat up. Funny, cuse im even scrawnier than b4. I rmb i used to be able to take on my whole class...picked a fight with each and everyone of them. I forgot the reason why, but i had to fight a lot of them at one point. Now, I'm useless. All the martial arts training was useless (So WUt if u can do the splits LOL, ur jus sacking urself in the balls). Can't even defend myself now, i forgot how to stand up for myself. I've been a changed boy --->man, or is the other way around *sigh.
I'm afraid of everything I do now.
e.g. when i get robbed, I can't do anything about it (e.g. "u wanna give me $20...." me: "ummm...sure")
Other things i fear:
- I fear my parents
- I fear death (...i never knew we would die in this place...) [some ppl fear "living"...and want "death"]
- I fear not knowing what to say
- I fear presenting myself in front of people
- I fear not being able to “think” (freeze)
- I fear ppl smaller than me...cuse they're actually stronger...even if they appear weak
but u no who i don't fear enough of...God. Sometimes, it doesn't even occur to me, that I'm not doing somethin in God's likeness.
i was jus writing my testimony, nd lol i jus randomly thought back to this
Sunday, May 10, 2009
why i blog...
That's why i like reading blogs so muchh...cuse u see God's works unfold right b4 your eyes, through other ppl's lives. It's just a beautiful sight...to see beautiful miracles working through each and every one of us here=)
Many ppl are truly...experiencing...tht "wonder" that comes with God's work.
It's great encouragement for sure. Nd reasurrance + motivation. Keep it up guys...
Many ppl are truly...experiencing...tht "wonder" that comes with God's work.
It's great encouragement for sure. Nd reasurrance + motivation. Keep it up guys...
Wut i learned...in Skool on Sunday
Today...Sunday School...the topic was about different "types" and "focuses" of churches:
Pentecostal (i wanna find out more about....nd i wanna meet someone from there, who ACTUALLY speaks in tongue. Wanna see it for myself)
Lutheran (Actually the teachings of Martin Luther King...I thot it was a jk)
Community
Alliance (focused on Missions)
Presbyterian (believes that bread changes into body, and juice chances into blood upon entering the body)
Baptist (focus on baptism, most conservative)
(No time to expand/elaborate.)
I've always pondered about these questions about life:
If chimp's don't have a soul (or a connection between God), but Humans do...what happens to a hybridization of half-human, half-chimp? (which is theoretically possible i believe...since we are 99.99% identical in genetic info). Does the new life have a soul, or not? Does he/she have a chance after life? ummm i actually learned...tht chimp's nd humans were capable of..u no. Tht's the only reason why i asked. (sorry if this question wus a lil mo liu...)
I've asked around and...
Answer#1: God chooses, it's His creation.
Answer#2: No. because it was human-formed, God did not intend it like this originally. Not God...but man, who engineered new life.
(But these are totally pov...cuse who knows...only God knows) I wanna know wut u think though! Btw, these are all hypothesis nd theory, it hasn't been done, or has it...iunno.
I've been told (by my dad)...that these questions are pointless/useless. I was given a lecture on why i ask so many questions...tht never lead to any answers.
P.S. Finished my testimony today!...hope all goes well.
Pentecostal (i wanna find out more about....nd i wanna meet someone from there, who ACTUALLY speaks in tongue. Wanna see it for myself)
Lutheran (Actually the teachings of Martin Luther King...I thot it was a jk)
Community
Alliance (focused on Missions)
Presbyterian (believes that bread changes into body, and juice chances into blood upon entering the body)
Baptist (focus on baptism, most conservative)
(No time to expand/elaborate.)
I've always pondered about these questions about life:
If chimp's don't have a soul (or a connection between God), but Humans do...what happens to a hybridization of half-human, half-chimp? (which is theoretically possible i believe...since we are 99.99% identical in genetic info). Does the new life have a soul, or not? Does he/she have a chance after life? ummm i actually learned...tht chimp's nd humans were capable of..u no. Tht's the only reason why i asked. (sorry if this question wus a lil mo liu...)
I've asked around and...
Answer#1: God chooses, it's His creation.
Answer#2: No. because it was human-formed, God did not intend it like this originally. Not God...but man, who engineered new life.
(But these are totally pov...cuse who knows...only God knows) I wanna know wut u think though! Btw, these are all hypothesis nd theory, it hasn't been done, or has it...iunno.
I've been told (by my dad)...that these questions are pointless/useless. I was given a lecture on why i ask so many questions...tht never lead to any answers.
P.S. Finished my testimony today!...hope all goes well.
Saturday, May 9, 2009
VIEWER DISCRETION ADVISED...Read, if u realli wanna...
ummm this is kinda personal...but i dun mind sharing, lol i realize i seem to be a realli vulnerable person. Wutever i think...i share. It's like, i have to get it out. But this has been with me fr a while...nd i finally pieced everything together.
(actually, these are all small entries nd thoughts that i decided to combine into ONE big post)
Journal Entry 1:
As all of you know...I've had experiences with doubt...
"i think i've finally found my source of doubt....which is...how can God create someone as stupid as me?? I'm always so unorganized, don't know wut im ever doing. I asked for wisdom, and i didn't get it. Wut reason wud God have, NOT to answer tht. It's a totally appropriate request that i asked of. Tht's y i doubt, if there is a God. A God that answers prayers. Cuse if He really is the God I've learned about fr my whole life...I should totally, feel His presence.
But God's love through every brother & sister in Christ that I've met so far...has been full proof itself that God exists. He works...constantly, everyday...tht's for sure. What greater love can come...from any else.
Journal Entry 2:
"Say it if it's genuine...don't say it, if it's not. (reminder to myself)"
Journal Entry 3:
"In the Bible, When God curses, He curses a whole lot of other ppl other than the man who had commited wrong. The man's relatives and descendants also get punished along with Him. Wut'd they ever do to deserve tht...is tht fair? Wut if those descendents never got a chance..."
Journal Entry 4:
"I always think...wut Honors God? Cuse the tiniest, littlest things...can upset Him. "
Journal Entry 5:
well...i guess you learned a lot about me. If u've read all the way to the bottom...guess it's another side of me u've been introduced to. The side i don't often like to share. kinda prepared tht sum ppl are gonna judge...but yea. Guess I'm transparent now to most u guys...but i long to be even more transparent b4 God. Wish i could learn to lift everything up to Him more often. I can positively say, I can't ever rmb every single thing i wanna say to God, every single prayer request or praise item i wanna life up to Him. But wut i think is...jotting down & journalizing as a reminder wrks.
pheww...tht wus a lot...wusn't expecting tht much tht i had...i DID copy & paste.
(Oh, nd I realize a lot of this is really blunt...so im srry, these are my most HONEST thoughts. It's not too often tht u might get them. I would call these...true words; tht most ppl find it hard to say. )
(actually, these are all small entries nd thoughts that i decided to combine into ONE big post)
Journal Entry 1:
As all of you know...I've had experiences with doubt...
"i think i've finally found my source of doubt....which is...how can God create someone as stupid as me?? I'm always so unorganized, don't know wut im ever doing. I asked for wisdom, and i didn't get it. Wut reason wud God have, NOT to answer tht. It's a totally appropriate request that i asked of. Tht's y i doubt, if there is a God. A God that answers prayers. Cuse if He really is the God I've learned about fr my whole life...I should totally, feel His presence.
But God's love through every brother & sister in Christ that I've met so far...has been full proof itself that God exists. He works...constantly, everyday...tht's for sure. What greater love can come...from any else.
Journal Entry 2:
"Say it if it's genuine...don't say it, if it's not. (reminder to myself)"
Journal Entry 3:
"In the Bible, When God curses, He curses a whole lot of other ppl other than the man who had commited wrong. The man's relatives and descendants also get punished along with Him. Wut'd they ever do to deserve tht...is tht fair? Wut if those descendents never got a chance..."
Journal Entry 4:
"I always think...wut Honors God? Cuse the tiniest, littlest things...can upset Him. "
Journal Entry 5:
"I was once asked: Is God perfect? Does God have a perfect face...? Is He perfectly baddd?
#1: "According to biology/evolution, the world dated back 4.6 billion years ago. According to the Bible, it only dates back to a few thousand years (7000 - ?000 yrs ago). Nd wut about carbon dating? Nothing makes sense in the Bible if u really look at it."
Friend 1: "There needs to be a battle between the Pope, and the smartest physicist in this world".
me thinking in my head: "It doesn't wrk tht way..."
You can't prove there's a God...if so, everyone wud've believed already. Nd tht wouldn't be called "believing"...cuse u see. It's a fact.
If Jesus is God. nd God is Jesus. How can Jesus be the son of God. Simple questions like tht...i can't even answer.
I have a tendency to create a stereotypical view of christians tht somehow turn ppl against it. I think it's the way I bring it up...sometimes, it's a bit random. To the extent that ppl become uncomfortable, nd claim "I'm converting them".
Journal Entry 6:
"Ways to improve CGOs
- don't watch movies! (cuse there's not much bonding & communication whatsoever)
- plan ahead, So we know wut we're doing ahead of time, nd tht we'll have backup, if anything
- don't go out so much (translates to spending money too much)
- Make sure quality time is spend with cell group members...nd not something else.
- Don't have secular activities in a non-secular place (such as church)"
my dad had a talk with me about this. Some things I agree...some I don't.
Journal Entry 7:
"I.N.V.U (I en-vy you)"
jks, no i don't. Love does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud.
Journal Entry 8:
(removed)
Journal Entry 9:
"I'm afraid..tht I won't know how to express...wut i'm afraid of. I gotta write a testimony.
had many struggles...one being **** (pleasures)...one being self-consciousness...one being skool.
Was never comfortable really sharing with big groups, and big audience, but cecilia asked me...and i can't back down now."
Journal Entry 10:
"lol...i think i spend too much time on blogger jus reading...nd commenting. "
Journal Entry 11:
"Nothin else better…than starting the day with…a FAMILY devos. We debate over things a lot, and often we end up in arguments...but tht’s wut we do, in Bible studies.
At times, I find it soo hard to get along with my parents. But during devos, I really get to know them better personally on a spiritual level."
Journal Entry 12:
"Philosophy and religion are two very interesting subjects that can lead to VERy interesting discussions, with VERY interesting debates...
Maybe I should've tried taking that course...but most people say i would get owned in that course cuse of Mr. Mullen."
Journal Entry 13:
I blog about a lot of stuff....but do i live it out? (rhetorical)
...all i can say is...i try.
Journal Entry 14:
For family cell group, wouldn't it be great to have a cell group...within a cell group! (jus like what we did last time). Instead of all of us...jus coming cuse our parents come, We can have our own fellowship too! Get too know each other...and REALLI feel like a family. We should organize our own programs...doesn't have to be anything big. It can be as much as jus chilling...like last time=)
-------------------------------------*End*--------------------------------------
(bet all of u guys read all the way down here...if u read at all)
All these things...were "drafts" I originally was uncomfortable posting. They jus kept accumulating.
well...i guess you learned a lot about me. If u've read all the way to the bottom...guess it's another side of me u've been introduced to. The side i don't often like to share. kinda prepared tht sum ppl are gonna judge...but yea. Guess I'm transparent now to most u guys...but i long to be even more transparent b4 God. Wish i could learn to lift everything up to Him more often. I can positively say, I can't ever rmb every single thing i wanna say to God, every single prayer request or praise item i wanna life up to Him. But wut i think is...jotting down & journalizing as a reminder wrks.
pheww...tht wus a lot...wusn't expecting tht much tht i had...i DID copy & paste.
(Oh, nd I realize a lot of this is really blunt...so im srry, these are my most HONEST thoughts. It's not too often tht u might get them. I would call these...true words; tht most ppl find it hard to say. )
One comes back...the other leaves lol
once again....I'm left with my dad, in this house. My mom just left for Calgary yesterday.
Nd I'll be going to Calgary a week from now, and be back after the weekend.
We cooked our FIRST successful meal today!...leftovers (that we combined into a dish LOL).
Nd I'll be going to Calgary a week from now, and be back after the weekend.
We cooked our FIRST successful meal today!...leftovers (that we combined into a dish LOL).
Friday, May 8, 2009
"Fear" is it...
this blog should've been made earlier (like yesterday), but i forgot to post it...so I'll jus post it now.
"Everyone knows...tht i suck at talking (in general).
(Gotta get rid of the studders. The repeating of ideas. The unecessary & unrelated comments. The nervousness.)
But talking in front of an actual group of audience, up on stage....is freakyy (not many of u might see tht in me, but it's true). Like those who know me...I reallyy, extremely dislike SPEAKING...when it's in front of PPL, that are just a lil bit MORE than I'd be comfortable with. I would avoid it...nd let better-speaking nd eloquent ppl speak instead. My heart beats faster than the beats of a drum set (horrible metaphor...) whenever I'm up there. Even when I know why im doing it for...I let "fear" consume me. Funny...tht's actually wut I'm suppose to talk about, "fear"...wut irony.
nd u no wut...this reminded me of the story of Moses, when God chose Moses to "Let His ppl Go!". And Moses just kept denying that role. He kept making excuses that his "speech was uneloquent" nd that he was a crappy talker, nd putting himself down in all. Kinda giving God tht attitude of "Who am I?? to lead all these ppl out of suffering...".
Nd i thought....tht's kinda like me rite now. I guess God's calling me to just be a witness for Him to other ppl, and I'm afraid to carry tht out. Just cuse of a small amount of fear I have. I'm still letting the earthly atmosphere control & affect me. I care more about...the exposure of my physical weakness...more than what God wants. But...it wud never be me speaking wud it...but GOD. If I truly wanna witness to ppl, I gotta speak....nd let HIS words flow through me.
To be honest, I wouldn't have really accepted it...if i knew it was gonna be such a big function in front of a big audience lol. I originally thought it was jus gonna be within a small group inside our fellowship.
This'll be my first time ever...sharing a testimony in front of a REAL audience. In fact, it's my first testimony ever actually. I've never done one like this...in my life. I've heard one too many times of other ppl's testimony; nd i guess it's about time I share mine (not even sure if i have one...as in, have much to share bout my spiritual life with God). Like many ppl...I haven't experienced any life-changing moments, where I def saw God working through me. But God works through everyone...whether it be apparent or not. Clay within His hands...tht's wut we are.
...so pray for me. "
(I've always felt this way...jus thot it'd be a good time to share it now.)
"Everyone knows...tht i suck at talking (in general).
(Gotta get rid of the studders. The repeating of ideas. The unecessary & unrelated comments. The nervousness.)
But talking in front of an actual group of audience, up on stage....is freakyy (not many of u might see tht in me, but it's true). Like those who know me...I reallyy, extremely dislike SPEAKING...when it's in front of PPL, that are just a lil bit MORE than I'd be comfortable with. I would avoid it...nd let better-speaking nd eloquent ppl speak instead. My heart beats faster than the beats of a drum set (horrible metaphor...) whenever I'm up there. Even when I know why im doing it for...I let "fear" consume me. Funny...tht's actually wut I'm suppose to talk about, "fear"...wut irony.
nd u no wut...this reminded me of the story of Moses, when God chose Moses to "Let His ppl Go!". And Moses just kept denying that role. He kept making excuses that his "speech was uneloquent" nd that he was a crappy talker, nd putting himself down in all. Kinda giving God tht attitude of "Who am I?? to lead all these ppl out of suffering...".
Nd i thought....tht's kinda like me rite now. I guess God's calling me to just be a witness for Him to other ppl, and I'm afraid to carry tht out. Just cuse of a small amount of fear I have. I'm still letting the earthly atmosphere control & affect me. I care more about...the exposure of my physical weakness...more than what God wants. But...it wud never be me speaking wud it...but GOD. If I truly wanna witness to ppl, I gotta speak....nd let HIS words flow through me.
To be honest, I wouldn't have really accepted it...if i knew it was gonna be such a big function in front of a big audience lol. I originally thought it was jus gonna be within a small group inside our fellowship.
This'll be my first time ever...sharing a testimony in front of a REAL audience. In fact, it's my first testimony ever actually. I've never done one like this...in my life. I've heard one too many times of other ppl's testimony; nd i guess it's about time I share mine (not even sure if i have one...as in, have much to share bout my spiritual life with God). Like many ppl...I haven't experienced any life-changing moments, where I def saw God working through me. But God works through everyone...whether it be apparent or not. Clay within His hands...tht's wut we are.
...so pray for me. "
(I've always felt this way...jus thot it'd be a good time to share it now.)
Women...(reminder)
Women are treasures on earth (nd desires) that God has given to us...gotta rmb tht. Nd we're sooo blessed to have them; cuse without them, we wouldn't survive (obviously), nd i can mean and imply tht in many many ways lol. Man and women were meant to be. God provides.
But nevertheless...they're creations...just like we are. We are the "created"...not the creator...for there only is...One.
We can't fall for something tht's created [by the creator]...but not the creator Himself. (as in, set ur priorities) I mean, if something so beautiful can be created...how much more beautiful can the "creator" be. He IS called the "Beautiful One".
If we were the creator, we cud do wutever we want, but we're not lol.
(Btw, hope i didn't offend aneone...God still loves us all the same)
P.S. i gotta stop day-dreaming during tests lol, it really affects me. Thinking is good...but thinking too much...bout realli random stuff...is not lol.
P.P.S. Candice, if ur reading...I learned a new riff (on piano)...let's add it to ur album...u can fill in the lyrics lol
But nevertheless...they're creations...just like we are. We are the "created"...not the creator...for there only is...One.
We can't fall for something tht's created [by the creator]...but not the creator Himself. (as in, set ur priorities) I mean, if something so beautiful can be created...how much more beautiful can the "creator" be. He IS called the "Beautiful One".
If we were the creator, we cud do wutever we want, but we're not lol.
(Btw, hope i didn't offend aneone...God still loves us all the same)
P.S. i gotta stop day-dreaming during tests lol, it really affects me. Thinking is good...but thinking too much...bout realli random stuff...is not lol.
P.P.S. Candice, if ur reading...I learned a new riff (on piano)...let's add it to ur album...u can fill in the lyrics lol
Kinda cool...
Just realized...
Every "nstrument" in my house that i managed to learn or pick up, have all been "kindly" donated or given to me by other ppl. I've never had to buy an instrument myself! (not like i could)
Keyboard ---> a present from my 2nd uncle (my dad's side, 二伯父)
Piano----> a present from my 1st uncle (my dad's side, 大伯父)
Drums----> donated by my 4rth uncle (my mom's side, 舅父)
Guitar---> TBD
i mean, if it wasn't for tht...I'd probably know how to play nothing rite now....nd i would have no life, maybe working on, iunno....physics or sumthin lol, tht my dad would probably force me to work on (nd I'm still not doing welll)
It's jus amazing how God has prepared all tht for me. I really AM loved...nd blessed. I AM the youngest one (out of both sides) lol jks.
Every "nstrument" in my house that i managed to learn or pick up, have all been "kindly" donated or given to me by other ppl. I've never had to buy an instrument myself! (not like i could)
Keyboard ---> a present from my 2nd uncle (my dad's side, 二伯父)
Piano----> a present from my 1st uncle (my dad's side, 大伯父)
Drums----> donated by my 4rth uncle (my mom's side, 舅父)
Guitar---> TBD
i mean, if it wasn't for tht...I'd probably know how to play nothing rite now....nd i would have no life, maybe working on, iunno....physics or sumthin lol, tht my dad would probably force me to work on (nd I'm still not doing welll)
It's jus amazing how God has prepared all tht for me. I really AM loved...nd blessed. I AM the youngest one (out of both sides) lol jks.
Thursday, May 7, 2009
Worship at School...
One time i was jus in the music room...jamming with myself lol nd kinda tryina pick up the guitar. Nd guess wuttt....Wut a surprise! My good friend Terence (Ho) had the same period lunch as me and decided to drop by! (Actually, I always knew he had the same lunch period with me, but we never had time to Chilll...).
So anewayz...Terence comes in...nd goes "Whoooaa, Conan...u come here during lunch?!". Nd I go..."Whoaa, Terence, YOU have lunch 3rd period??" (i actually knew wut lunch period he had).
Nd yeappp we started jamming. Besides tht...we played worship songs=) Just any that came to our heads. He was on the guitar, while i played on the keyboard; nd sometimes we would switch it up. Mannn I look forward to period 3 lunch everyday now! it's all i look forward to now lol.
I never thought i could be able to just have this time to worship...esp at school. Never imagined that, during the spare time when i had absolutely nothing to do....I could be jus playin songs of worship=), with Terence my buddy. But jus to clarify...worship should be done 24/7. In EVERYTHING u do....it should be glory to God anewayz. But today (nd kinda yesterday), we got to just jamm with worship songs...nd really sing praises. I thought that was pretty neat. Some ppl dropped by here nd there...nd we were jus like "we're jammin on some worship songs....wanna join?", although not many were christian. But they enjoyed listening in.
So anewayz...Terence comes in...nd goes "Whoooaa, Conan...u come here during lunch?!". Nd I go..."Whoaa, Terence, YOU have lunch 3rd period??" (i actually knew wut lunch period he had).
Nd yeappp we started jamming. Besides tht...we played worship songs=) Just any that came to our heads. He was on the guitar, while i played on the keyboard; nd sometimes we would switch it up. Mannn I look forward to period 3 lunch everyday now! it's all i look forward to now lol.
I never thought i could be able to just have this time to worship...esp at school. Never imagined that, during the spare time when i had absolutely nothing to do....I could be jus playin songs of worship=), with Terence my buddy. But jus to clarify...worship should be done 24/7. In EVERYTHING u do....it should be glory to God anewayz. But today (nd kinda yesterday), we got to just jamm with worship songs...nd really sing praises. I thought that was pretty neat. Some ppl dropped by here nd there...nd we were jus like "we're jammin on some worship songs....wanna join?", although not many were christian. But they enjoyed listening in.
Wednesday, May 6, 2009
WUDD UPPP!!!...
mannn...don't think i ever done anything to deserve this LOL
i actually haven't gotten a chance to play around with it tht much yet...my parents play around with it more than i do lol. Ohh if u didn't know already, my cousins (across the street) are the ones who gave it to me. Nd fr wutt??...i dunno. They had the heart to shipp the whole drum set across the neighborhood to me. I've really been blessed with such nice, generous cousins.
"WUDDD upppp" [wus wut i was tryina say in the pic).... (btw, i wus jus posing, i have nothin to play the drumset with yet...explains y im holdin a ping-pong paddle instead lol)
(all i need know, is a drum pedal...nd i can play non-virtual, "REAL" ROCK BAND, at home)
Btw, dun ask about the background....-_- lol
P.S. whoaa everybody's backk...
i actually haven't gotten a chance to play around with it tht much yet...my parents play around with it more than i do lol. Ohh if u didn't know already, my cousins (across the street) are the ones who gave it to me. Nd fr wutt??...i dunno. They had the heart to shipp the whole drum set across the neighborhood to me. I've really been blessed with such nice, generous cousins.
"WUDDD upppp" [wus wut i was tryina say in the pic).... (btw, i wus jus posing, i have nothin to play the drumset with yet...explains y im holdin a ping-pong paddle instead lol)
(all i need know, is a drum pedal...nd i can play non-virtual, "REAL" ROCK BAND, at home)
Btw, dun ask about the background....-_- lol
P.S. whoaa everybody's backk...
As a servant...
I need some guidance from above...
at least give me a sign or sumthin...
tht I'm still someone, You can constantly work through.
Make me a humble servant.
at least give me a sign or sumthin...
tht I'm still someone, You can constantly work through.
Make me a humble servant.
Sleeep...
it's true...wut they say...sleeping DOES make you tired...too much of it that is. There's a certain limit between over-sleeping and lacking of sleep. Sometimes, you sleep for more than you need to, and it doesn't seem to make much of a difference in terms of "awakeness" and energy level. Whenever you have to force youself to wake up; tht's a good thing. Never wake up when u "feel" like it. I gotta discipline myself more often.
I can sleep for 1 hour (with the help of some stimulants)...and still be as energetic after sleeping 9 hours. (wait, this might apply only to some ppl...other wise, I'm weird)
I had the best dream yesterday (or today...), maybe tht's why i couldn't wake up.
I can sleep for 1 hour (with the help of some stimulants)...and still be as energetic after sleeping 9 hours. (wait, this might apply only to some ppl...other wise, I'm weird)
I had the best dream yesterday (or today...), maybe tht's why i couldn't wake up.
Tuesday, May 5, 2009
Stuff I speak NOT of...
i really hate to blog about skool. But…it's been tormenting me fr the past couple of weeks. I dream bout it.
I try not to blog about it too much...cuse i no everyone else is probably JUST as or even more stressed out than me. Every body talks about skool. It's a burden for everyone.
even though mid-terms are done. Nothing's realli different...I'm stressed and burnt out jus as much. Nothings changed...in fact, it feels like the work loads jus started. Nd exams are already near, srry, didn't mean to remind every one so early. Actually, it isn't...realli. lol
I try not to blog about it too much...cuse i no everyone else is probably JUST as or even more stressed out than me. Every body talks about skool. It's a burden for everyone.
even though mid-terms are done. Nothing's realli different...I'm stressed and burnt out jus as much. Nothings changed...in fact, it feels like the work loads jus started. Nd exams are already near, srry, didn't mean to remind every one so early. Actually, it isn't...realli. lol
Some things..."unnecessary"
i really hate it when ppl say "God d***" fr no reason. Like it's not even used in the right context. "*gaspp* i got perfect on this test...God D***mmnn", or "God D***** tht's cool...." Like, is tht even necessary. It doesn't even express any part of tht sentence any better. One of the things tht kinda tick me off a lot. I really wanted to question..."do u no wut the heck ur saying?...i think u should no wut ur sayin, before u say it."....or "Don't say sumthin if u don't know what it means". Tht's like my pet peeveee...
srry...sound kinda mean. But i never say this stuff out loud. I only think it.
sometimes...it feels like they're meant to be "intentionally" offensive. iunno. It's said a lot...when im around.
srry...sound kinda mean. But i never say this stuff out loud. I only think it.
sometimes...it feels like they're meant to be "intentionally" offensive. iunno. It's said a lot...when im around.
don't really understand...this world
When is life...really considered life? (According to science, fetus' start feeling "pain" and develop a nervous system by 3 weeks) mannn I've still been pondering over that question...although it's been over-asked.
Abortion, is the worst thing ever...u could do to life. You kill it, you murder it. Nd when i say tht...i mean it literally. When you abort a baby, you gotta go in and kill it in the mother's womb. Nd from what I heard...a blender is used to cut the baby into pieces inside the mother, and the remains are flushed out using some kinda technology. Tht jus grossed me out, disgusted me. I couldn't believe the class...fr lack of better words, i thought they were "heartless". I mean...how can someone still encourage abortion??! They were soo against ppl...who tried to stop abortion.
It's true...and it is clearly written..."only those who believe, receive eternal life." Life's unfair. And at some point, I thought God was unfair. Well I guess, it was always unfair...since He's God, and we're not. Obviously, there's a big gap between the two. But at some point, i realized, tht dwelling on the behaviour of God was pointless...cuse we'll never understand. Who ARE WE...to understand. Someone soo different from us...we are but...creations, by a creator.
Abortion, is the worst thing ever...u could do to life. You kill it, you murder it. Nd when i say tht...i mean it literally. When you abort a baby, you gotta go in and kill it in the mother's womb. Nd from what I heard...a blender is used to cut the baby into pieces inside the mother, and the remains are flushed out using some kinda technology. Tht jus grossed me out, disgusted me. I couldn't believe the class...fr lack of better words, i thought they were "heartless". I mean...how can someone still encourage abortion??! They were soo against ppl...who tried to stop abortion.
It's true...and it is clearly written..."only those who believe, receive eternal life." Life's unfair. And at some point, I thought God was unfair. Well I guess, it was always unfair...since He's God, and we're not. Obviously, there's a big gap between the two. But at some point, i realized, tht dwelling on the behaviour of God was pointless...cuse we'll never understand. Who ARE WE...to understand. Someone soo different from us...we are but...creations, by a creator.
Monday, May 4, 2009
How lucky I am...
!!!!!!....I GOT A DRUM SET! (without a bass pedal though)
i wonder how often I'll use it now...
So blessed to have such nice nd generous cousins. i guess eventually...i didn't have to get one, cuse i no i never wud be allowed to anewayz. They jus shipped it to us from a few houses (since we're neighbors).
i don't think I thanked them enough...I didn't realli know wut to say.
I guess being the youngest/smallest does have its "up" sides.
Now...i wanna get a guitar...so we could play not "virtual" rock band...but REAL rock band.
Thank you God, for providing (although, it's really more than enough), and giving me such kind and generous family/relatives that I'm just so fortunate to have grown up with. You've been realli considerate=)
(Ohh opps srry, i jus realized i broke my "blog fast", it's only been 1 day lol)
i wonder how often I'll use it now...
So blessed to have such nice nd generous cousins. i guess eventually...i didn't have to get one, cuse i no i never wud be allowed to anewayz. They jus shipped it to us from a few houses (since we're neighbors).
i don't think I thanked them enough...I didn't realli know wut to say.
I guess being the youngest/smallest does have its "up" sides.
Now...i wanna get a guitar...so we could play not "virtual" rock band...but REAL rock band.
Thank you God, for providing (although, it's really more than enough), and giving me such kind and generous family/relatives that I'm just so fortunate to have grown up with. You've been realli considerate=)
(Ohh opps srry, i jus realized i broke my "blog fast", it's only been 1 day lol)
Sunday, May 3, 2009
Excess of anything = Not good
I've been bloggin too much...I'm gonna give it a break. I haven't been doing anything else much. I really have too much to say. But I'll save it for some other time...
All I did yesterday...was blog. there's enough to readd from all the previous posts lol. I'll let ppl catch up on those first. There are a few things i need to do.
All I did yesterday...was blog. there's enough to readd from all the previous posts lol. I'll let ppl catch up on those first. There are a few things i need to do.
Srry...got distracted again.
Just like vectors, we add and build each other up (by keeping accountability) in order to reach the resultant displacement (destination).
(I'm not doin good in vectors, it's suppose to get harder.)
(I'm not doin good in vectors, it's suppose to get harder.)
Sumthin Creative...
T.O.P. = Time of (Prayer)
T.Y. = Thank You (Praise)
D.S. = Died for Sins of mankind
S.R. = Saviour's Resurrection
G.D. = God's Destination for us
Borreddddddddd LOL, actually i have a lotta stuff to do.
(k, i jus realized that ppl might not get tht....yea, so fr ppl who don't know, those are the members of BIG BANG. nd if you don't know who BIG BANG is, then...u deserve to not get it.)
T.Y. = Thank You (Praise)
D.S. = Died for Sins of mankind
S.R. = Saviour's Resurrection
G.D. = God's Destination for us
Borreddddddddd LOL, actually i have a lotta stuff to do.
(k, i jus realized that ppl might not get tht....yea, so fr ppl who don't know, those are the members of BIG BANG. nd if you don't know who BIG BANG is, then...u deserve to not get it.)
The Older we Get...
If u told an S.K. kid bout the story of, let's say...Noah's Ark & the flood...they would probably believe you. If u were to tell a non-christian friend about Noah's Ark, they would most likely NOT believe you. Cuse none of it makes sense.
The older we get....the more knowledgable we get, the more experience we gain, and the less vulnerable & susceptible one can be. Cuse we now...know how to think on our own! Things actually have to make sense now. And at the same time, our hearts become hardened and defensive over time. Tht's why at childhood...tht's probably the best time, to spread tht knowledge to them. Tht's how i grew up. I was blessed and fortunate to have been raised in a christian family.
Jesus said: "Let the little children come to me."
When I was young, I believed anything. I liked to imagine. I loved Bible stories! I rmb once...i started to cry...when I found out that I would die someday. I use to think that ppl just lived forever on this earth. But when I was told...a better place I would go after I died, I cheered up. But when I found out that...Jesus died on the cross for our sins, I started crying again. LOl. The wonder of being a child...felt so good. Experience only comes once, nd not ever again after tht. iunno...kinda wished i never met reality. But reality also has it's up sides.
We have come to know what reality is like, what life is like.
The older we get....the more knowledgable we get, the more experience we gain, and the less vulnerable & susceptible one can be. Cuse we now...know how to think on our own! Things actually have to make sense now. And at the same time, our hearts become hardened and defensive over time. Tht's why at childhood...tht's probably the best time, to spread tht knowledge to them. Tht's how i grew up. I was blessed and fortunate to have been raised in a christian family.
Jesus said: "Let the little children come to me."
When I was young, I believed anything. I liked to imagine. I loved Bible stories! I rmb once...i started to cry...when I found out that I would die someday. I use to think that ppl just lived forever on this earth. But when I was told...a better place I would go after I died, I cheered up. But when I found out that...Jesus died on the cross for our sins, I started crying again. LOl. The wonder of being a child...felt so good. Experience only comes once, nd not ever again after tht. iunno...kinda wished i never met reality. But reality also has it's up sides.
We have come to know what reality is like, what life is like.
Blogging can be a good thingg...
I used to complain a lot whenever I blogged (nd i think i still do, a bit), but hopefully, I'll use it more as a place to "praise (God) & pray (fr one another)" cuse God works...each and every day. Also, a place to be accountable with one another.
Btw, my dad STRONGLY opposes me blogging...cuse he thinks it's a waste of my time. I wouldn't be surprised if blogger gets blocked soon LOL.
Btw, my dad STRONGLY opposes me blogging...cuse he thinks it's a waste of my time. I wouldn't be surprised if blogger gets blocked soon LOL.
Different side...Same body of Christ (does it matter?)
I've thought about this a lot...nd im not gonna deny it anymore. I want to go to the ENGLISH side, NOT the chinese side. Where do i wanna get baptised?...probably in the english side. Since I already wrote, or planned out my testimony in english LOL. Not sure if ppl in the Chinese side wanna hear a testimony in English. (I have a feeling my dad might make me translate it though, or He wud do it). nd +, to be baptized, is to witness to other ppl that you are A FOLLOWER of God. umm I want my friends to be there! Ppl who've seen me spiritually grow, mature and experience God's work through this church. Nd if i get baptized in the chinese side, there are also most likely going to be baptisms in the english side too. Is it necessary for ppl to have this conflict? choosing which baptism they wanna go to (which is most likely gonna be in eng side, since I'm like the only one in the chi. side). It's really hard to back down now. Maybe I should talk to my dad a bit more about this.
Btw, Just to put it out there, my Dad's a cool guy, He wants what's best for me. Nd we're pretty chillz with each other. At times, we could be friends (which is very often actually). My dad, (unlike most dads, iunno?) really likes to talk to me. And I'm a son, who doesn't mind listening (most often). So sometimes, we can jus keep goin on forever...and I never get to do my Hw. But yea, we do devos sometimes together, which is a great thing (I think).
Well k, some of the reasons I'm still in the Chinese side, is because:
1) I wanna respect my parents, (or at least give them a better impression so that they dun have to worry soo much, since i've already been such a rebel whenever they're not around)
2) Don't wanna ditch my dad, He doesn't have many friends over there. (I'm his friend). No offense.
3) I have this other friend in the chinese side that sits with me. Her name is Corinne, so i dun wanna ditch her either. In fact, I encouraged her to come with me to the english side too. But she has her reasons, why she's not able to.
Ever since my dad came back, everything's been back to normal. Even though, it was only two weeks, tht i attended the english side (since he was gone); it felt like a DRASTIC new change having to go back to the chinese side again. It's like i was already accustomed to going to the eng side. Give me patience...
Everytime I come on Sunday, I just "feel" like i have to go to the english side, nd then i rmb, oh crapp, i usually go to the chinese side. I wasn't really use to the "change back".
BUT u no, i've come to a conclusion, It really doesn't matter which side I attend. Different buildings...same God. Same Family. Choosing what language is jus a minor thing (but ofc, u need to understand wut they're saying)...the prime focus is God. He's the center of it all.
But one thing is proven to be true, i do get distracted very easily...sometimes i zone out/sleep in the chinese side; but I also get distracted in the english side. So, should i zone out/sleep in the chinese side, or talk to friends in the english side? lol. As u can see, both choices are kinda negative. But tht's really up to me...whether i let tht stuff happen.
I've been missing english Sunday School lately...I will wake up earlier.
Btw, Just to put it out there, my Dad's a cool guy, He wants what's best for me. Nd we're pretty chillz with each other. At times, we could be friends (which is very often actually). My dad, (unlike most dads, iunno?) really likes to talk to me. And I'm a son, who doesn't mind listening (most often). So sometimes, we can jus keep goin on forever...and I never get to do my Hw. But yea, we do devos sometimes together, which is a great thing (I think).
Well k, some of the reasons I'm still in the Chinese side, is because:
1) I wanna respect my parents, (or at least give them a better impression so that they dun have to worry soo much, since i've already been such a rebel whenever they're not around)
2) Don't wanna ditch my dad, He doesn't have many friends over there. (I'm his friend). No offense.
3) I have this other friend in the chinese side that sits with me. Her name is Corinne, so i dun wanna ditch her either. In fact, I encouraged her to come with me to the english side too. But she has her reasons, why she's not able to.
Ever since my dad came back, everything's been back to normal. Even though, it was only two weeks, tht i attended the english side (since he was gone); it felt like a DRASTIC new change having to go back to the chinese side again. It's like i was already accustomed to going to the eng side. Give me patience...
Everytime I come on Sunday, I just "feel" like i have to go to the english side, nd then i rmb, oh crapp, i usually go to the chinese side. I wasn't really use to the "change back".
BUT u no, i've come to a conclusion, It really doesn't matter which side I attend. Different buildings...same God. Same Family. Choosing what language is jus a minor thing (but ofc, u need to understand wut they're saying)...the prime focus is God. He's the center of it all.
But one thing is proven to be true, i do get distracted very easily...sometimes i zone out/sleep in the chinese side; but I also get distracted in the english side. So, should i zone out/sleep in the chinese side, or talk to friends in the english side? lol. As u can see, both choices are kinda negative. But tht's really up to me...whether i let tht stuff happen.
I've been missing english Sunday School lately...I will wake up earlier.
Lookin' Back...(Why?)
Sometimes, When I don't really feel like doing devos, maybe cuse i think im not in the mood for it, or my heart just isn't there; I think back:
Q: Why do I do devos?
A: To get to know God a lil better each time.
Q: Why do I wanna know God better?
A: So we can find out what God wants us to do, in this life.
Q: Why do we wanna do God's will?
A: Cuse we love Him.
Q: Why do we love Him?
A: Cuse He loved us first.
(jus a thought tht randomly came to me.)
I can proudly say....tht I've constantly done devos for two weeks. One in the morning, nd one before sleep. It's great to experience God's word and messages He has for you. In general, I feel his presence more often.
"Those who take their sin seriously, remember Christ's cross gratefully."
I can't agree more with that, it's jus soo true, it applies to me.
Q: Why do I do devos?
A: To get to know God a lil better each time.
Q: Why do I wanna know God better?
A: So we can find out what God wants us to do, in this life.
Q: Why do we wanna do God's will?
A: Cuse we love Him.
Q: Why do we love Him?
A: Cuse He loved us first.
(jus a thought tht randomly came to me.)
I can proudly say....tht I've constantly done devos for two weeks. One in the morning, nd one before sleep. It's great to experience God's word and messages He has for you. In general, I feel his presence more often.
"Those who take their sin seriously, remember Christ's cross gratefully."
I can't agree more with that, it's jus soo true, it applies to me.
Saturday, May 2, 2009
It ENDS here...the last of the 7 posts (in a day)
If ur wondering how I'm getting all of these ideas all of a sudden, it's just stuff that we talked about yesterday in Dido Bible study (tht was worth 7 posts in one day LOL).
Sometimes, I think I share too much for my own good...tht's wut I've been told. But i think i developed a comfortability, with jus bein able to share out in the open. I actually want to get stuff off my mind, since i struggle to express it most of the time anewayz.
Sometimes when i share...i don't know if i offend ppl at the same time. Tht's why i hesitate at times. But apparently, not rite now. I've gone all out today, don't think i've spent much time doing anything else LOL.
Never spent such time on blogger...ever.
Sometimes, I think I share too much for my own good...tht's wut I've been told. But i think i developed a comfortability, with jus bein able to share out in the open. I actually want to get stuff off my mind, since i struggle to express it most of the time anewayz.
Sometimes when i share...i don't know if i offend ppl at the same time. Tht's why i hesitate at times. But apparently, not rite now. I've gone all out today, don't think i've spent much time doing anything else LOL.
Never spent such time on blogger...ever.
Forgive...but forget?
I don't know about you guys...but whenever I forgive, I certainly don't forget. As in, what's done is done. Unless you erase it off my memory somehow. When I've been hurt once...I'm usually not sure if i want to be hurt again. I dunno. For me, I find it easy to forgive. But most things, I can never forget (unless it was something sooo minor). And when i don't forget, sometimes my perspective on ppl change. I may look at ppl differently, if they did something to change the impression i used to have on them. But of course, I still won't treat him/her anymore differently; but jus in my head, I'd be like "So that's who/how he is...". Would i still trust him/her?...it depends realli. cuse iunno...I've had some bad experiences.
But definitely...always forgive, cuse the Bible said so. I've made tht a habit.
In Ephesians 4:26, "Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry"...tht verse has always stuck with me. Nd I've made sure...tht never happens.
But definitely...always forgive, cuse the Bible said so. I've made tht a habit.
In Ephesians 4:26, "Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry"...tht verse has always stuck with me. Nd I've made sure...tht never happens.
Some tip-pers...(applies mostly to myself)
tips I often give myself (skills i think are important, socially):
- Be humble
- Be Considerate, (unselfish)
- Be an "encourager", a "comforter"
- Be positive
- Be Confident
- Be Responsible
- Be "myself"
- Be Aware, of other ppl's situations. Put yourself in their shoes. Understand.
- Be slowww to anger
- Show that you care, and that you love
- R.A.K. (Random Acts of kindness)
- Focus on the situation itself, and not the ppl around it
- don't be too serious bout everything (have a sense of humour)
- Get STRAIGHT TO THE POINT (tht's a big one fr me)
- Discipline myself (not slacking off), push myself out of comfort zone
- Don't think, DO.
- Topics: upcoming events, related events (to the person)
- See everyone as children of God.
- READ THE BIBLE!
some of these might solely apply to me. Rmb...these are MY goals lol. But sum might relate to u guys.
(i used to have more, but i lost my list)
Jus to tell u...I fail to live up to most of these goals i give myself (prob. even less than half). But tht's wut i aim for...everyday. Esp at school. Sometimes, u can start off as simple as following ONE first, nd then work ur way up. Ummm...tht's wut i usually do.
well, an example (from my last post) i can think of is skool....
Don't know if u guys ever thought bout this...but "marks" in school can be somethin "earthly" and "material" that we all would do anything for rite now. Nd i found that through tht...it's made myself into a selfish person. All that matters to us really (at this stage), are marks. We would step over others and bring them down...jus so our marks will work out for the better. Iunno, i've jus realized tht lately. When ppl ask me fr help...I give it a good thought first..."When i help him/her, will i be helping myself more?...or him/her more?". And sometimes I decide not to help ppl...cuse i don't want them to do good. So if i teach them how...they'll get it; and when they get it...they'll do good. (Mann i was evil, i was totally guilty of all tht). I usually only help ppl...only if it helps me. Otherwise, there wud be no reason to. Anything that brings everyone else down, nd me up...was worth going for.
In school projects, sometimes, i could care less about my other project partners. As long as im done my part, they're on their own.
Don't know if u guys ever thought bout this...but "marks" in school can be somethin "earthly" and "material" that we all would do anything for rite now. Nd i found that through tht...it's made myself into a selfish person. All that matters to us really (at this stage), are marks. We would step over others and bring them down...jus so our marks will work out for the better. Iunno, i've jus realized tht lately. When ppl ask me fr help...I give it a good thought first..."When i help him/her, will i be helping myself more?...or him/her more?". And sometimes I decide not to help ppl...cuse i don't want them to do good. So if i teach them how...they'll get it; and when they get it...they'll do good. (Mann i was evil, i was totally guilty of all tht). I usually only help ppl...only if it helps me. Otherwise, there wud be no reason to. Anything that brings everyone else down, nd me up...was worth going for.
In school projects, sometimes, i could care less about my other project partners. As long as im done my part, they're on their own.
The HEaRt...
Question...
Have u guys ever done anything for the benefit of others?...or was the benefit fr yourself, tht seemed to be for others. I'm always guilty of that, nd still am.
Sometimes when i do stuff...I always go "Why am i doing this? Why am I helping him/her? is there somethin in it for me, in the end?..." before i actually do it. Sometimes u think you're doing someone else a favor, but ur actually doing urself one. Or...as long as i help this person, it'll also be helping me. ME...it's all bout me.
Nothing I ever do...has never benefited me. And the problem comes, when tht's wut u think about first.
Dear God,
please humble myself before You, and take away my selfish thoughts and deeds.
Amen.
Have u guys ever done anything for the benefit of others?...or was the benefit fr yourself, tht seemed to be for others. I'm always guilty of that, nd still am.
Sometimes when i do stuff...I always go "Why am i doing this? Why am I helping him/her? is there somethin in it for me, in the end?..." before i actually do it. Sometimes u think you're doing someone else a favor, but ur actually doing urself one. Or...as long as i help this person, it'll also be helping me. ME...it's all bout me.
Nothing I ever do...has never benefited me. And the problem comes, when tht's wut u think about first.
Dear God,
please humble myself before You, and take away my selfish thoughts and deeds.
Amen.
Anger...something most ppl don't wanna see.
I really want to remain...the calmest, and un-easily-angered person I always thought i was....someone who never gets madd, no matter what. I've tried that before once...and I've come to a conclusion. It's not possible. (for me at least) cuse...
1) sometimes, things just need to be expressed. Your message must get across.
2) This'll probably only make sense to me: but I'm afraid that being "calm & friendly" will kill my social skills. I'm scared tht...i won't know how to talk back to ppl later on in the future lol, if i don't develop that habit of "talking back" (this probably makes no sense to anyone). I dun wanna be tht kinda person. Someone who keeps avoiding things, tryina run away from conflicts and fights. Being the person, who ends a "quarrel" just so it doesn't have to build up. I'm starting to become annoyed by the thought of tht. I'm afraid...of change, or tht I'll change. When I'm the one to end a fight...I always feel like the loser. It feels so unsatisfying. It's so unsatisfying....to know that the other person thinks you have nothing more to say, cuse they're right. When u actually do....but u just wanna let the person know SO BADLY tht all u want...is to fight no more (but u can't, cuse tht wud jus defeat the purpose). Cuse u no tht the conversations is not gonna go anywhere...nd u have OTHER stuff to do, besides arguing lol.
But u'll need those skills out there. The ability to "talk back" to ppl. No one wants a quiet guy, who doesn't really know how to talk, or logically argue bout stuff. No one likes a guy who agrees with EVERYTHING. those ppl usually aren't realli too interesting, if u no wut i mean. Nd wut are friends for...to give u HONEst feedback about stuff. If they're always jus gonna agree...u no, does it make a difference whether they're here or not (srry, i sound kinda harsh). But yeaa, tht's ultimately what im afraid of. Being a someone...tht'll turn out like tht.
I no it sounds like i thought all this out really deep, but i've kinda always felt tht way.
Anewayz, back to "anger",
I was told...anger is usually a bad thing (leads to sin). The only exception is when u turn anger against sin. Jesus got angry too...at the temples. So did God...when ppl disobeyed Him. Usually when I'm angry, it's not for the right reason, so I'm still tryina cut it down. U guys probably rarely see me angry...but, im not sure if u want to. LOL jks. I usually don't get angry at "ppl" too much, I usually get angry at "things".
heh...jus a thought. jus speakin some truth tht i always thought...
P.S. I'm not angry or anything...I'm actually in a pretty good mood today. But i reflected back...nd kinda evaluated myself. iunno lol
1) sometimes, things just need to be expressed. Your message must get across.
2) This'll probably only make sense to me: but I'm afraid that being "calm & friendly" will kill my social skills. I'm scared tht...i won't know how to talk back to ppl later on in the future lol, if i don't develop that habit of "talking back" (this probably makes no sense to anyone). I dun wanna be tht kinda person. Someone who keeps avoiding things, tryina run away from conflicts and fights. Being the person, who ends a "quarrel" just so it doesn't have to build up. I'm starting to become annoyed by the thought of tht. I'm afraid...of change, or tht I'll change. When I'm the one to end a fight...I always feel like the loser. It feels so unsatisfying. It's so unsatisfying....to know that the other person thinks you have nothing more to say, cuse they're right. When u actually do....but u just wanna let the person know SO BADLY tht all u want...is to fight no more (but u can't, cuse tht wud jus defeat the purpose). Cuse u no tht the conversations is not gonna go anywhere...nd u have OTHER stuff to do, besides arguing lol.
But u'll need those skills out there. The ability to "talk back" to ppl. No one wants a quiet guy, who doesn't really know how to talk, or logically argue bout stuff. No one likes a guy who agrees with EVERYTHING. those ppl usually aren't realli too interesting, if u no wut i mean. Nd wut are friends for...to give u HONEst feedback about stuff. If they're always jus gonna agree...u no, does it make a difference whether they're here or not (srry, i sound kinda harsh). But yeaa, tht's ultimately what im afraid of. Being a someone...tht'll turn out like tht.
I no it sounds like i thought all this out really deep, but i've kinda always felt tht way.
Anewayz, back to "anger",
I was told...anger is usually a bad thing (leads to sin). The only exception is when u turn anger against sin. Jesus got angry too...at the temples. So did God...when ppl disobeyed Him. Usually when I'm angry, it's not for the right reason, so I'm still tryina cut it down. U guys probably rarely see me angry...but, im not sure if u want to. LOL jks. I usually don't get angry at "ppl" too much, I usually get angry at "things".
heh...jus a thought. jus speakin some truth tht i always thought...
P.S. I'm not angry or anything...I'm actually in a pretty good mood today. But i reflected back...nd kinda evaluated myself. iunno lol
the motherload (materialz)...
Getting drums (still waiting for it)....wanna get a guitar...nd got new earphones today.
I sound very materialistic.
I sound very materialistic.
YEa yee...
=)....I don't feel so lonely anymore. There was never really reason to be...I mean, how could i have ever felt like tht. Sometimes, u just got to learn to see and realize all the blessing in your life.
Dear God,
I pray for a brother...or sister....if it's not too late. Although You've given me soo many of them already. Can never thank You enough for such a wonderful, carin' family.
Amen.
P.S. Candice, we cud be siblings fr the next week. (if things weren't so busy, nd if u weren't all the way down there) =0!!...we cud finally start our lil production! (or is it still happening?) Everything's ready rite...we jus need ppl.
P.P.S. Btw, I'll be leavin for Calgary in a couple of weeks for a cousins wedding. So hope all goes well nd smooth! Praise God fr such blessings...nd pray fr a safe trip of course.
Dear God,
I pray for a brother...or sister....if it's not too late. Although You've given me soo many of them already. Can never thank You enough for such a wonderful, carin' family.
Amen.
P.S. Candice, we cud be siblings fr the next week. (if things weren't so busy, nd if u weren't all the way down there) =0!!...we cud finally start our lil production! (or is it still happening?) Everything's ready rite...we jus need ppl.
P.P.S. Btw, I'll be leavin for Calgary in a couple of weeks for a cousins wedding. So hope all goes well nd smooth! Praise God fr such blessings...nd pray fr a safe trip of course.
Friday, May 1, 2009
The Importance of fellowship...
I think Fellowship is:
- a neccesity for growing as a body of Christ
- innegligable (if tht's a word)
- place for spiritual accountability
- place where u won't be judged (frm wut i see, although it can't ever be 100%)
- place to chill n fellowship!
Why do we come to fellowship...to do things (God-centered) "TOGETHER"
I use to come to fellowship cuse i was lonely, nd bored...i wanted some brothers and sisters to chill with (cuse i dun have siblings like everyone else, to talk to). Nd i thought...it's about time, i got some friends LOL. Makes me feel a like a loser back then. But yea, i guess I'll jus admit, i kinda was one. Nd i realized i was in lack of one thing...love. lol. Home-sweet, brotherly sisterly love. Tht was something that became a necessity for me. I would almost die (metaphorically speakin, with tht said)...without love.
But then I realized, I can't just keep receiving love....I gotta GIVE IT, to other ppl who are in need of some brotherly love! (Ultimately from God). Ppl who used to be just like me...who need it just as much. Now tht I've received, it's only fair tht i give back (seems like i've said this a lot lol)
Well, the very very first time I came...was cuse Brian invited me, I believe. lol (not too positive). I helped out in VBS with him, so tht's when he took the opportunity I guess...to strike! lol. I thank him so much for that; and I thank Dido all the more. All us brothers nd sisters in Christ, can't wait...well, hopefully we'll see each other in the future really as children of God, maybe when this life ends, or maybe when we get to heaven. Even though it probably wouldn't matter then.
- a neccesity for growing as a body of Christ
- innegligable (if tht's a word)
- place for spiritual accountability
- place where u won't be judged (frm wut i see, although it can't ever be 100%)
- place to chill n fellowship!
Why do we come to fellowship...to do things (God-centered) "TOGETHER"
I use to come to fellowship cuse i was lonely, nd bored...i wanted some brothers and sisters to chill with (cuse i dun have siblings like everyone else, to talk to). Nd i thought...it's about time, i got some friends LOL. Makes me feel a like a loser back then. But yea, i guess I'll jus admit, i kinda was one. Nd i realized i was in lack of one thing...love. lol. Home-sweet, brotherly sisterly love. Tht was something that became a necessity for me. I would almost die (metaphorically speakin, with tht said)...without love.
But then I realized, I can't just keep receiving love....I gotta GIVE IT, to other ppl who are in need of some brotherly love! (Ultimately from God). Ppl who used to be just like me...who need it just as much. Now tht I've received, it's only fair tht i give back (seems like i've said this a lot lol)
Well, the very very first time I came...was cuse Brian invited me, I believe. lol (not too positive). I helped out in VBS with him, so tht's when he took the opportunity I guess...to strike! lol. I thank him so much for that; and I thank Dido all the more. All us brothers nd sisters in Christ, can't wait...well, hopefully we'll see each other in the future really as children of God, maybe when this life ends, or maybe when we get to heaven. Even though it probably wouldn't matter then.
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