The truth is...I don't really like it here.

Ppl drink, party, smoke, get high, stay out late, have sex, and swear soo much. And this stuff is happening ALL around me, with no one to back me up...in my faith. Not even Chris, unfortunately, altho he seemed eager at first. I don't want to be one to put down a bro in Christ, but i see...what i see. I too am also guilty, so i am not here to really judge anyone.

Uni IS one of the biggest test to whether you conform to the world; or transform others. You know how "stupid" you look when you try to transform others? Why would anyone wanna transform towards something that has restrictions...it's all about freedom, selfishness, and living LIFE rite now! Who cares about living for anything else?? Who cares about living for One greater than you, and being someone lower...like you're His *(there's a word i have in mind, but i will not use it)*!! Who cares about the "real life" in store for you. Who cares about "Jesus First, Others Second, and yourself last"? Who the frig caresss?!?!?

it's YOJ, not JOY...YOJ is such a disgusting word, if it even is one.

There are no fellowships here, nothing (I thot there was, cuse i was told..)...so i couldn't directly find a brother or sister in Christ there, even if i wanted to. Everyone there, iunno, seems too "different"...in a bad way, this time. Such a way, that I'm not really use to. It's just that...I thought I would find a dim light, in the midst of all this "darkness" i guess. Altho a dim light, still a light. But i didn't find any...

*sigh...

Was i ever prepared Father....

I feel most at home at SCAC.

who knows, it might get better when school starts. When ppl gotta step it up anyways. There'll be less partying i guess.