Like, I get frustrated at myself when I can't say what I want to say. But the thing is, ppl dunno that. They think I'm being frustrated at them, or tryina be defensive, or getting offensive...or just not interested in the convo.
I suck at talking...I already know. I end up saying the most randomest things (with the help of some *studders)
And yo, I'm such a kid sometimes. I act like one, literally. Kids (b4 a certain age) are usually selfish, asks a lotta questions, curious bout a lotta things. They don't know anythin about self-lessness, self-control, and impression/reputation nd stuff like that yet. They only care wut's "physically" good for them or gives them pleasure (srry, i hope tht's the rite word). At times, I stop caring for others, and only care bout myself. I don't care who I hurt, as long as I benefit from it. I really Hate...srry, "dislike" those ppl. And that is a truth about me, and proly quite a lot of others...since we're human. But im working on it.
And when ppl keep askin me about UOIT, I don't know what to say. Cuse i dun wanna start off with, "It's the crappiest place to be in..." (at the moment). No offense to UOIT. More directed at ppl there...it'll never be home, or feel like home there. At least, "spritually" it'll never be...there'z zit, zero clubs/fellowships i can join. That's y i would drag myself all the way back to Dido/colluni on the weekends, like my life depended on it.
Pet peeves (about myself): When ppl make the effort, and i don't.
Explanation: When someone talks to me cuse they care about me, or just out of their good intentions and good heart, I often ruin it for them. K, tht was just an example. But basically, when someone cares for me...I don't end up showing the same, in return. That also frustrates me when I can't do that. YEapp, that's more like it.
Sometimes, I just try to be humorous, but i can't. Ppl take me seriously. Like, I actually don't want that. I wanna be someone with a sense of humour too! I actually really hate serious ppl...too serious fr me. Usually, when you hang around "extremely serious" ppl; I'll be honest, they're quite boring. But be serious when it's a time to be serious, and joke/kid around when it's not. Ofc, I don't like a joker while doin serious stuff. But i can't stand...when everyone takes things literally, don't joke around, basically having no sense of humour. It relaxes the mood, and you'll enjoy it more.
I want to learn...how to say "NO".
to temptations of course...
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